| absolute spirit |
a philosophical martini. |
| accident |
a substantial spill. |
| analytic philosophy1 |
a redundancy. |
| Being |
what everybody is doing. |
| Being and Time |
nice work, if you can get it. |
| continental philosophy1 |
an oxymoron. |
| dasein |
marker on the road to intersubjectivity. |
| DGS1 |
that faculty member of each department in charge of demoralizing
graduate students. |
dissertation completion
schedule1 |
the first lie on the c.v. |
| Eminence, an1 |
famous living academic whose work is relevant but sloppy. |
| formal logic |
the art of turning speculation to certainty. |
| hack1 |
a person to whom the following critria apply: (1) wrote a paper
accepted by the APA selection committee; (2) has a full-time job;
(3) is published in the Journal of Philosophy; (4) is not an
Eminence. |
| informal logic |
neither. |
| interviewer1 |
a worshipped and feared subset of hack; a hack with power. |
| irrelevant1 |
an argument which addresses more than one sub-sub-field of philosophy,
but is not written by an Eminence. |
| job candidate1 |
all of the following must apply: (1) an individual so convinced
of his/her superiority to the members of the search committee that
their rejection is further proof of his/her philosophical integrity
(and intimidating presence); (2) an individual so convinced of his/her
superiority to all other candidates that their selection for an interview
or job is further proof of his/her philosophical integrity, and their
status as hacks; (3) an individual who proudly declares his/her distance
from hack sellouts, until offered a job. |
| Platonic Form |
what you need to get the transcendental deduction. |
| Polis |
abandoned city north of the Republic. |
| praxis |
how do you get to Polis? (praxis, praxis, praxis) |
| relevant1 |
anything written by an Eminence. |
| sloppy1 |
missing the subtle distinctions between sub-sub-fields which protect
the arguments of hacks from the criticisms of an Eminence. |
| sound |
(1) an argument showing what we should believe but won't; (2) indeterminately
produced by falling trees. |
| specialty1 |
the second lie on the c.v. |
| substance |
an accident waiting to happen. |
| substance abuse |
medieval philosophy. |
| sub-sub field1 |
(1) invented by advanced graduate students so they can write an
"original" dessertation; (2) the largest set of problems or issues
one is permitted to master prior to becoming an Eminence; (3) the
smallest permissible area of philosophy to which an APA paper session
can be dedicated. |
| thing-in-itself |
marked by a condition of extreme ontological shyness. |
| trancendental deduction |
tax break for philosophers. |
| valid |
an argument showing what we could believe but don't. |
| white male applicant1 |
(1) the distinguished gentleman who, in the face of the fact that
80% of all jobs go to fellow w.m.a's, resolutely, politely, and with
the proper amount of courtly embarassement reveals that his job was
stolen by a black feminist; (2) thinks that "avoiding PC" requires
this announcement. |