A Gentleman- Elegant Man
APT pat
Alec Guinness   Genuine Class
Animosity       Is No Amity
Armageddon- mad god near
Astronomers- moon starers
Contradiction   Accord not in it
Decimal point- I'm a dot in place
Desperation     A Rope Ends It
Diplomacy- Mad policy
Dormitory- dirty room
Eleven plus two     Twelve plus one
Endearment- tender name
Evangelist- Evil's Agent
Falsehood- has fooled
Fragile- e.g., frail
Greyhound- hey, dog run!
Margaret Thatcher-That great charmer
Mother in law- Woman Hitler
Pittance- a cent tip
Presbyterian- best in prayer
Prognosis- signs: poor
Protectionism- nice to imports
Ramschackle- charms? leaks
Received payment- every cent paid
Rocky mountains- o, man--- ski country
Semolina        Is No Meal
Seraglios- girl oasis
Sexual intercourse- relax, enjoy coitus
Slot Machines   Cash Lost in 'em
Snooze Alarms   Alas! No More Z's
Stormy weather- showery matter
The Conservative Party      Teacher in vast poverty
The Earthquakes     That Queer Shake
The Morse Code  Here Come Dots
The Public Art Galleries    Large Picture Halls, I Bet
The cafeteria- fact: I eat here
The nudist colony- no untidy clothes
The relief pitcher- fierce hitter? help!
The stutterer- utters t-there
Wild oats- sow it, lad
a steward- draws tea
angered- enraged
blandishments- blinds the man
cabaret- a bar, etc
christianity- charity's in it
conversations- voices rant on
debit card- bad credit
delicatessen- ensliced eats
desegregation- Nergros get aid
hibernated- bear hit den
hypocondriac- cry ``ohh, Doc... pain''
in flagrante delicto- Ted, Ella fornicating
incomprehensible- problem in chinese
inconsistent- n is, n is not, etc.
negation- get a ``no'' in
old masters- art's models
past due- date's up
pastorship- parish post
sunbathe- heat burns
the eyes- They see
the piano bench- beneath choppin
waitress- a stew, sir?

President Clinton Of the USA-
	To Copulate he finds interns


To be or not to be: that is the question, whether tis nobler in the
mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

In one of the Bard's best-thought-of tragedies, our insistent
hero, Hamlet, queries on two fronts about how life turns rotten.

That's one small step for a man, one giant leap for mankind.-
Neil A.  Armstrong
A thin man ran; makes a large stride; left planet, pins flag on
moon!  On to Mars!


"Everybody has heard that if you use every letter in
 RONALD WILSON REAGAN, permuted, you will obtain
 INSANE ANGLO WARLORD -- but did you know that GEORGE
 HERBERT WALKER BUSH, similarly cracked open to reveal
 its hidden secret, gives us HUGE BERSERK REBEL WARTHOG?

 We all know how to deal with an Insane Anglo Warlord;
 we've had lots of them in our history.  But nobody is
 really prepared for a Huge Berserk Rebel Warthog.  It's
 like living in a surrealist painting."

                -- Robert Anton Wilson, Cosmic Trigger II