  The Ghost in the Cabin All right, so Kurt went to sleep one night (morning) at 5am. Our Cordy is not one hundred percent housebroken, so there was a few poos on the loose. Kurt and I have often marvelled how such large poo can come out of such an eensy anus, but this is one of the mysteries Cordy holds. Kurt cleaned the couple o�poo, and he fell asleep. I awoke at eight, and let the dogs out to do their dirty deeds outdoors, they happily went out, and little Cordy had another hero-sized poo. Back to sleep went I, and awoke again around 11am. In that space, of a mere 3 hours, there were eight poos strewn about the hallway, strategically placed so, if Sis woke up and had to relieve her own bowels, she would be quite literally full of shit. I made a move to clean the poo, but Herr Gag reflex implored me to get assistance. I woke a semi-grumpy Kurt up to clean, and I let zee dogs out again. Kurt attested that there was more than one animal pooping on the floor in those three hours; could Lucas have regressed? I considered this point and deemed it unlikely, since Lucas is too prissy to even go outside when it�s raining, let alone crap in his own personal space (unless, of course, he were ill, or desperately seeking revenge.
) As Kurt was cleaning the poo, getting more and more frustrated, I noticed that there was yet another poo that I had previously not spied, I warned him too late as he stepped backwards in some mess. I had not seen this poo before. I dropped my glance downwards, and there was a menacing poo at my feet, previously unnoticed. I was lucky enough not to step in it, and I heard Kurt groan as he flattened another poop. To bring this up to speed; there were now 11poos where previously eight questioned my stomach�s tenacity.
I counted. It was daylight. Another note; Cordy had not eaten since the night before. And she pooped approximately 13 times in 7 hours? The thought would be that this was a Diearrea sort of poo, but nope. These poos, were firm, human sized, and not the greasy smear that diaherrtic doggie poo usually announces itself. (K, so spell checker cacked when I tried to spell the poo word that begins with D�spelling suggestions, anyone? ) All of the sudden, as I stared at the poop at my feet, I realised that this situation was entirely ridiculous. Insane. Unreal. And then, I had an epiphany; like someone had lifted the veil on the mystery of the poo.
It was the fricken HOUSE pooing! A poltergeist with an overactive, corporeal bowel. A bad spirit with equally noxious intestines. Or, simpler; something in the house was changing things around to make frustration the prevailing theme. I mean, we left all the animals, three dogs and a cat alone, on full stomachs for over twelve hours the night previous. We came back to Paul�s where Cordy had eaten some paper, and peed on the floor once. ONCE. Also, as of the last two weeks or so before our holiday excursion, she was asking to go outside when she experienced full intestines.
Our problem was that Cordy didn�t seem to get that pee was another bodily function not allowed in the house. Ghost poo. You read it here first. Thus concludes the tale. What's your New Year's Resolution? I never have one, leastwise, not one that begins on the New Year. But something I am going to try to do is remember the things that i find important.
Intitutively, I would think that by virtue of things being important, I wouldn't forget them. Not so. One thing I�m ashamed of forgetting bit my ass today. The West Memphis Three are still in jail, have been in jail since 1993, and after finding about the case from my dear friend Roger Ebert, I promptly forgot all about it. Forgot that three guys around my age got tossed into jail wrongfully, and are likely to stay there until they die. And I forgot. Well, not this time, though. Go to the web page on these guys. Then, pray for justice for these, and the many others like them. http://www.wm3.org/ 
