  The weirdest days are yet to come Jon and I faught yesterday, although i have such strong feelings for him, i also feel a sense of resentment towards him, maybe its not resentment... but I ... I seem to have problems talking to him sometimes, maybe jelousy, or something else, i dunno......
Anyway, that date with Mr. X was no go, No show, I got stood up, wow did i see that coming or what, he was too busy and I had to tell mom about it and when i called him asking where he was she dictated everything for me to say and my mom scared him away.
so he said "forget it"... a day after he broke up with Mrs. X and now... I'm alone again... and not even able to have ... Jon in the back of my head... he said something last night, hit me kinda hard, because well, i realised that its no different with him or Jared, I'm no good this far away from him, so whats the point of gapping over it..... I didnt talk to anyone today...... at school... i was by myself .. and i could care less if people missed me or not... MOOD: Lonely, Sad, Lost Song: Hello -Evenesence 
