  Oh, the indulgence. I have time now. Time to fuck around on the internet, time to clean my world from top to bottom, time to write Christmas cards to loved ones and wrap pressies.
I can do whatever I want, so long as it doesn’t cost anything. Speaking of cards, guess who I received one from today?! ANNA! Ms. Marchant from Italy, my super-duper crush from my Italy life. Oh… I’m still smitten with her. I sent her one too. She always gets postcards when I leave the country. I like having her in my back pocket as a distant pal. She’s still sailing, going with her man to Croatia and Greece where they won a regatta. Ugh, she’s cool. I sent her copies of those luscious pictures of me and Kerri, plus one of me all sunburned and happy in Barbados at the pool bar, half submerged in water and loving it. What I really want is for Anna to reciprocate so I can finish that alter I’ve been working on. I negotiated the maze that is Palomar Hospital this morning to deliver a card to Ivy, a colleague of mine who’s in CCU from a near-fatal car crash.
No, I don’t know her. It’s just the humane thing to do. Is the sudden vacancy of Christmas break going to wreck me? Most people look forward to vacations from school. I worry. I need that structure. I need that backbone of stability to steady my hand. “Substitution, Ref! Bring in a replacement distraction. Any suggestions? Need to start stalking someone, I guess. 
