  Ha! Judgement Day has arrived, and I find myself in the sweet arms of salvation, all woes rectified, all justice doled out to those whove stood in my way! Today was the premiere class for the Queer Studies course Im taking (along with my four favourite LGBT group members). Never before have I felt so comfortable in a class. Where I no longer had to govern my mouth and thoughts to filter out my sexuality. Where I had the complete backing of not only my classmates (many of them, anyway), but the professor as well.
Total comfort. And in a subject I swear Im gifted at reading. Film classes taken so far total four at the university level. I spoke up more today than I ever have in any class. We watched some poor production value obscure thing from 1986. three vignettes about relationship intimacy. The first, a lesbian and a straight woman agreeing to have sex, an oral contract being formulated on the bounds and concerns. The second, two men having sex in a bathroom stall, an oratory coupling, with all the intimacy of a handshake. The third, a straight man and woman having paid-for phone sex, another oral connection, the woman lying about herself and having little to say when it comes to fantasizing about sex, and the man pleasing himself while he willing submits to the lies.
Terrible production values, but it was fun to pick apart and discuss it as a class. Had to bite my tongue so as not to dominate the discussion with too many of my opinions and insights. I always have so much to say about the technical aspects of direct filmmaking like these things. Theyre not too subtle in general. And shoot, when Rallin polled the class, How many of you are familiar with reading films, have taken other film studies courses? I was THE ONLY ONE of 50 or so who raised her hand. The film the third scene elicited quite a bit of laughter.
This woman after all is being paid to have phone sex. Yet she quickly runs out of vocabulary, the space filled in instead with lots of yeahs and repetition. He asks, after the usual vanilla scenario having been played out, what else shed do to him. Not an ounce of creativity, the woman goes on to basically repeat said scenario. How lame! SMBD? Anal? Different locations/positions? Toys? Groups? Power play?
Sheet, mayn. Theres too much possible to have a loss for words. Finally to end the conversation when the words completely dried up, she says shes busy and tells him to call back another time. SUCH a commentary on vanilla heteros. Thats it?! I mean, I think gay people have the upper hand there, the skill of inventing new ways of getting off than the expected standard for what constitutes sex. Most of us do, I suppose. Look at our past Pres, Mr. Bill Clinton. He tried to say that oral isnt sex. Ah-hem. No one buys that, yo. But isnt intercourse the traditional standard that others measure other acts. What /is/ sex? Do you have to finish for it to be good? Does there have to be some kind of penetration?
Is anal not sex? Yeah, problematic indeed. This class is going to rock. And Rallin is this adorable gay man, middle eastern, silver hoop earrings to compliment the over 50 thin bangle bracelets on his left arm. Twirling as he speaks, searching for the exact phrasing he wishes for. Very smart (dresser), very articulate, very adorable. I would have cried in protest if the class was taught my some stodgy old straight person. His face is so beautiful. Why are gay men more attractive to me than straight ones? (no threat to my autonomy, I suppose. And theyre nicer, dont let their penises ruin the whole entanglement) Lets see how many people did we scare away with the class content and sexually suggestive film? Maybe ten in total I dont know. Someone was counting. I just sat back self-assured that their departures would only serve to make the class environment more enjoyable, less contentious.
Shit, this film was polite. No nudity, no penetration I could have shown it to a high school class. I see more sex on daytime soaps. (Ok, no. I dont watch them I dont really have a leg to stand on there, comparing it) Im off to buy some beer and smokes, a reward for a thrilling day of bravery encouraged. Sun setting in the west, fires in the facing windows. 
