  bleatban.jpg"> Sure glad I did the homework required of me for Heathers class. Visibly upset to the point of condescension, she was fuming politely at our class for our collective inability to pull off an online explication using WebCT. And quite honestly, I felt sorry for her. She goes to the trouble of explaining how to get into the system over and over gain during class time, and still about a quarter of the class fucks it up and cant get in.
Or just failed to pay attention to her deadline instructions. Im glad I pay too close attention to things, even those too small to lose sleep over. I would hate to have alienated myself, thrown into the category of the 13 people whose names I have on a list who couldnt manage the assignment. I think Id cry if I got her upset with me. Instead, I got her to approach a group of three of us having a smoke outside of class to ask face-to-face whether she was being too aggressive or mean about the whole thing. I didnt say it, but what really angers me is that those of us who have the wherewithal to get our work done will end up being penalized for it; the others get more time to work on it, and now that the deadline has passed, they also get the benefit of knowing the explication questions ahead of time.
Bastards! I think I expected to be a lot more preoccupied this morning in her classes. A little afraid of being there after my blgo blunder. Yall know me, and by that you have a context to place the things I write about in here. But she she was not supposed to get on that group emailing list announcing my triumphant (and depressing) return to the writing/fighting lines.
I ate a whole roll of tums this weekend worrying about the mistake. Then today, instead of shrinking into myself, I actually had things to contribute to class. Calling out page numbers for passages of note, making connections about the colour of the green knight in Sir Gawains story and the metaphorical meaning to it, reminding her when she asked where we left off the class before in another class. I dont think Ive spoken that much in all my class meetings with her so far this semester. Weird how that ended up working out.
Not yet taken a good long look at the poetry assignments for this class about to start. Mainly just focused on a mini-explication due to be graded and handed back. Im sure I did well, and I want the boost. When all goes to hell, what always feels better is to rake in the successes (however small) at school. Self-identification fortified with some positives for once. 
