  WHO IS THE YA YA EMPRESS?  Hey there,  it's Jef from urlLink Cult of Je f in his first ever guest blog,  while Ya Ya Empress and Chris the Great are in Italy. nbsp;  I hope they are having a wonderful time.  To tell you the truth,  I don't know Ya Ya ( May I call you Ya Ya?  very well. nbsp;
 We just collided like two people trying to carry several drinks back to our individual groups of friends in a bar one night,  but I just keep coming back to learn more.
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 She's kind of like those little chocolate covered pretzels -  you can't eat just one.  So,  I thought I might explore and ask the questions others may be too afraid to ask:  Who is Ya Ya Empress?
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 What is her evil plan for world domination?
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 Where does she keep her secret chocolate stash?
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 I am determined to probe Ya Ya.  deeply .
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 First,  what is a ya ya?
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 Ya can be an acronym for " Young Adult"  and " Yet Another.
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 It is also the feminine for yo yo in the lost Serbian language Shoolencrouch,  which links her roots back to the once powerful country of Hotchglosia,  whose descendents have now fled to an underground of retail terrorism,  flooding American stores with useless Ronco rip- off's such as pasta bowls with built- in colanders,  shoes with retractable wheels and devices to bejewel denim jackets.  Secondly,  what is an empress?
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 urlLink Dictionary. com defines an empress as the woman ruler of an empire or the wife or widow of an emperor.
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 This can mean only one thing.
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 Chris the Great is secret Russian royalty and he has been replaced for her own dark purposes by a him- bot,  which is a robot duplicate of the original Christ the Great.
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 She can now rule through her puppet pawn with no one being the wiser.  except me,  the thorn in her diabolical side.  To begin my research,  I have started with her urlLink first post from Thursday,  October 12,  2003,  and I have determined that Ya Ya is a drug user.
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 That's right!  You heard it here first.
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 She engages in the dangerous practice of mixing over- the-
counter medications together for a Theraflu/ Nyquil cocktail.
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 She obviously does not understand how to responsibly use Nyquil.  It should only be used to treat colds,  sedate hyperactive children and as a morning beverage.
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 Further information gleamed from this post indicates her culvert operation is centered in Midtown Manhattan,  which the Muppets once took quite successfully.
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 When she isn't plotting to take over the world,  Ya Ya likes to further explore her flannel fetish,  which she innocently refers to as PJ's,
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at home.
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 She says that she believes in the institution of marriage to throw us all off into believing that she is a humble housewife and not&
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the international woman of mystery that she is.
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 She closes her message by waxing on about her enthusiasm for Christian holidays wrapped in pagan traditions and and a future rendezvous with her family,
 AKA her henchmen/ henchwomen.
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 While this may look like a harmless post,  I was able to have it analyzed by one of our country's top encryptologists,  Dr.  Hubert E.  Pickens at the University of Podunkville,  Alabama.
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 Using a special computer program,  Dr.  Pickens revealed that this post contains a secret message,  which is " More diamonds needed for the death ray.
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 Send salami immediately.  I will close for now,  but if I should disappear,  do not be surprised if the CIA shall contact you in code here.
