  YA YA REVOLUTION Today,  our revealing expose on Ya Ya Empress continues.  A post from Friday,  October 3,  2003 provides our first definitive proof of her trusty sidekick,  sweetly referred to as Becca . nbsp;  However,  she is also known as Becca The Bruiser on the undercover circuit. nbsp;  Ashcroft has photographs,  magnificently captured in black and white I might add,  of BTB holding Mormon missionaries' bicycles over a trash compactor until they agreed to do her evil bidding. nbsp;  The Bruiser has also been known to discreetly do away with top level officials by slipping them genetically altered Dr.
 Peppers with the fizz of death .
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 In other news on this day,  Ya Ya,  sends a secret message out to her supporters for a secret project thinly veiled as televised wrestling.
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 In reality,  Ya Ya has masterminded a plan to harvest the transients looked down upon by society into an indestructible army of darkness.
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 Yes,  the code name Smackdown can mean only one thing -  a finely tuned crack whore martial arts squadron.
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 It is a straight man's best fantasy and worst nightmare as he watches them pull those Chinese stars off their nipples and plant them firmly in his chest.
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 I shudder even now as I think about it.  On Tuesday,  October 6,  2003 ,  Ya Ya has decided to make her him- bot,  formerly known as Chris the Great,  into the general of her Crack Whore Debutantes of Death (
CWDOD)  &
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by dressing him up as a,  and I quote,  " transvestite Viking.
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 The CWDOD is on constant standby,  ready to respond with one subtle movement of the horn on his helmet,  his long blonde pigtails flowing out behind him like a Nazi propaganda film that can only be achieved by a well placed stage fan.
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Thank Becca the Bruiser for that one,  disguised as a hotel maid with a peg leg and monocle.  Thursday,  October 9,
 2003 ,
 shows that Ya Ya has planted her him- bot undercover at the Mandarin Oriental New York Hotel at Columbus Circle ,  which is a sinister match with his fatal,  chopstick- wielding skills.
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 In addition to stealing small,  scented soaps in the shape of Chairman Mao's head,  popping the freshness seals on freshly cleaned toilets.
 misdirecting room service to deliver big juicy steaks to vegetarians and speaking with a bad Chinese accent picked up around,  say Cuba,  he will be on the ready to steal what Ya Ya has been after for years.  the ancient Chinese secret from their laundry services.
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 With it,  she could develop secret weapons that could wrinkle freshly pressed clothes within a 50- mile radius of ground zero.
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 There is nothing worse than a wrinkled news anchor,  which could effectively destroy the morale of the entire city,  or more unthinkable,  New Jersey.  Finally,  on Wednesday,  October 15,
 2003 ,
 we are lucky to find a secret message from BTB to the Ya Ya.
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Don't you just love secret code?
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 "
Becca"  confirms the chilling effectiveness from Ya Ya's push cart tests and agrees that they should arm Ya Ya's crack whore soldiers with them.
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 Sashaying down the streets on roller skates,  and gaudy outfits stolen from the rack of Frederick's of Hollywood ,  her crackerjack crack whores will take out the strongest citizens of New York first by snapping their spine from the impact of their shopping cart and then carting off the body in their cart as if it is just another homeless person dressed smartly in an Armani suit.
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 Feeling overly confident,  BTB uses the name of her best undercover agent,  Mr.  Lovan Tomas,  and leader of her below 14"  feline spy ring.  In her last post for the day,  Ya Ya confesses her plan,  once again symbolically hidden in code,  to steal the testicles of every man in the world.
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 Yes,
 she talks about someone stealing a baseball at a game,  but it only makes patent her true intent for the society she wishes to create -  Boys Without Balls ( BWB)
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 What diabolical purpose can she have for all of these bollocks?
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 Stay tuned.
