  It's Saturday. It's close to 8pm. I'm all dressed up with nowhere to go. Shannon's at a wedding shower for Susan. Her betrothed is urlLink Rudy , my good friend, who has to put an appearance in at the shower. So all of those people are out of the picture until at least 10pm. My brother isn't answering his phone, and urlLink Ben is probably still working. I can't call my cousins or anything because I don't have the car. Where's the car? With Rudy, Susan, and Shannon. Why didn't I drive her to the shower? Because Shannon had to work, rush home to change, then rush back to get to the shower, which is on the other side of town.
Yes, I know there is a party store and bar right by the house but A) Drinking alone makes me feel like an alcoholic, and B) My ATM/Check card has a tear in the strip which makes it useless in the ATM machines and credit card machines at the bar and party store. I found that out when I walked over there earlier today. Actually it was the second time I walked over there, because I get 25 feet in front of the party store only to realize that I had forgotten my wallet. OUI! So while the urlLink Reno 911 marathon on Comedy Central is entertaining, I need, want, must get out of this apartment.
I want to get crazy and wild and say rude things. I want to make off color jokes about priest's and small children while choking back the pre-vomit of beer and Jagermeister. I AM BORED AND TRAPPED IN MY HOME! PLEASE GOD, SEND ME SOMETHING TO DO! SEND ME A HERO TO RESCUE FROM MY PRISON! 
