  I don't know what's happening to me but I'm getting more and more depressed. I think it's because every time I get a lesson from my teacher I feel like crap because I sound like shit compared to him but in a way it's good. I'm improving alot, and in time, I may be as good. Also Heaton posted flyers for guitar needed for our band and nobody called but prankers. So this sucks, my life sucks. It'll get better I suppose. Either James, Heaton or I will find a guitarist and do it the way we always wanted to. I think I'm gonna pray tonight that we find a guitarist. That's it, I'm gonna pray because I haven't done that in years. I'm gonna pray to god. I'm gonna look like one of those boys kneeling on his bed with the moonlight shining in from the window on the cover of Catholic books.
So I'm gonna pray, that my dream to be a successful classic rock/heavy modern rock band works out. And if not I'll just have to wait a year or so until SSM's guitarist (Dan) and bassist (Pat) get kick ass awesome. Well they already are, but they'll be even better with more time, and more experience. Oh the possibilities, the choices, what does my future bring me? I worry about it everyday. I'm interested in only one thing, the future of me. Oh god, I need therapy.
My brain is flipping everywhere. Everyone I know, I feel as if they're all fading away from me. I feel isolated from everything. Where is my mind? Where did I go? What the fuck is happening to me? I need some lemonade. 
