  Fear and phobias Ok, you all know that not much out there can really instill fear in my heart. I even have a poem blasting fear as a product that fails to move me. I was bullshittin you all. Some of you might know, some of you might not. I can't explain how much I am scared to death of urlLink Waterbugs .
These little damned insects will have me squirming and maybe even curling into the fetal position and sucking on my big thumb. I have always availed myself as a badass. A dude can come to me with a gun and a knife and it won't phase me. He pulls out a waterbug and I will let him fuck me if he wants. I am terrified of them things!!!!!!
When I was young ( 3 or 4 years old ), I lived with my parents in the typical ghetto tenement building. Old decaying walls, garbage everywhere, no real Air conditioning but a shit load of fans. My mother always used go into the kitchen and kill three or four waterbugs before starting her wifely duties of cooking for my pop. I remember on many occasions, she used to grab the waterbugs by the antenna and chase me around the house. I used to crawl under my bed where she couldn't get me and emerge about an hour later. I spent alot of my childhood under my bed. That is why I never believed in monsters under my bed, I spent more time down there then what they did.
With that staunch memory being in the dome, I grew up with this fear of waterbugs that I can't shake. It has gotten so bad that I might even move if I see one in my apartment. Last night , I was talking to a friend of mines that I called back and she left a message on my machine that said she just finished killing 4 waterbugs and that she was chasing one down. I called her back and left a message and told her that I will never, ever, no way in fucking hell visit her.
Don't offer me dinner, a drink, coffee or ass or three days of non-stop sex. There is absolutely nothing that will get me to her house. Matter a fact, I won't even go into her neighborhood. My moms did a number on me when I was young. She chased me around with Octopus also. Have you ever seen an Octopus getting cooked?? It looks horrid. So, she used to take it out to remove the outer skin and she chased me around with it, so, under the bed I went.
It was kind cool down there sometimes. I love my moms but she is solely responsible for half the nutcase things I have done!!!! LOL. My moms is a comedian with a bad temper with a slight pshychological edge on normal people. Her idea of teaching me how to cook was making sure that I thought that cooking was like playing a game or having fun. She would challenge me to a race to who can clean their respective rooms first.Ironing was a privledge and not a chore. Sweeping and mopping was something that only " little special kids get to do ". Yea, special in that little yellow school bus type of way. So, this weekend is the 4th of July and I am not too crazy about going out but I am hitting this BBQ.
Gotta get some food up in the system. I am the designated cook in the Prospect Park shindig tomorrow early. I have to call and get details. So, I hope you are all going to have fun and be safe. Remember that we still are living in some fucked up times. So, just be safe. Oh, also, SIGN THE GUESTBOOK YA BASTARDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Say something.... say you love me, want me, hate me, admire me. Say happy gay day or something.!!!!!!!!!! Peace, Love Take care, Fish >)))"> 
