  Hee hee........... I know I know, I said I wasn't going to blog but I broke down not even a day after I said it, I am week. I need help! Is there a bloggers help group? Well, yesterday was probably the best day of 2003. I went to visit my aunt. She is the wife of my Uncle ( father's brother ) that was killed back in 1991.
After my uncle died, we really drifted apart and it was really my fault. I stopped going over there and it was one of the first reported " shutting out " pieces of my life. My aunt has been keeping contact with my mother keeping tabs on me. When my mother gave me the number and I put it in the cell, it was just a matter of time before I called.
Sure enough, yesterday was the day that made for a re-assuring moment in my life. My immediate family includes my mother, father, aunt, and cousin. It felt awesome to sit in her living room at 11pm and drink her coffee. Her coffee is what made me smile when I was little. I almost cried yesterday talking about Christmas and the good times we had over there. I held in there and kept a level head.
I realize that family is the best thing in the world. Family is what makes ya tick this steady tick. I went to see her in hopes of finding a reason and confirmation of me wanting to have my own family. When she hugged me, it made me realize things can change. Life is not that bad. I felt how much she loved me. How I thought of how she remembers me being born and my Dad taking me to her house when I was 3 days old and she held me.
This wasn't just a friend of 15 years, she was family. It felt good. It felt loving It was something that has been missing in my life for too long. When my uncle was killed, I really lost it. I didn't care about much nor anybody. It was this rebel side of me that sought destructive means. Let's be thankful that all changed. :) Be good people Peace, Love, Porkchops Fish 
