  I broke down and called Mary. It was killing me not talking to her for so long. We were fucking friends, I was her only friend! JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. I FUCKING HATE HER HYPOCRACY AND I AM SO FUCKING HURT BY ALL THE SHIT THAT THIS IS DOING TO ME! I told her so much shit that I don't tell just anyone.
And when she decided that we couldn't be friends anymore all those secrets flew off into a million places and I'll never get them back. I told her about Behren. I told her about my ED. I told her about Cataldo! The worst part, I can't tell just why I am so upset. Is it because I lost a friend?
Or, worse, is it because she has all this shit on me and I have none on her? The worst thing I know about Mary is that she's in a fucking cult, she wears a size 7, and that she's (gasp) cheated on countless occasions. Big fucking deal. This is how my phone call went. I dialed. Lynne picked up.
"Is Mary there? " "Yes, just a minuet. " Silence. I timed aforementioned silence. Two minuets. Three minuets.
I heard muffled whispering and I pressed my ear closer to the phone, vainly trying to hear. "Anna? We're actually on our way out the door right now and Mary's still not done getting ready. Can I have her call you back? Like, tommorrow? " "Yes.
" I hang up. Then I cried for a good twenty minuets. I suck, I suck, I suck. 
