  No sleep for me last night. I tried and tried. It's so awful being a sleepless freak. I feel asleep somewhere between three and three fifteen, only to be fully awake again at three-thirty. I became very mad at myself around four, because I had to leave for school in a little over two hours.
So I cried and listened to a burned CD I shamelessly entitled "Grab the tissues". After a very distraught, long journal entry I concluded this: I am a freak. Seriously, what the fuck is wrong with me? Aside from never sleeping, I'm never content. Its the damn nagging feeling that I've forgotten something, that something is missing. I don't even feel lost. That's maybe the worst part of feeling this way. Because I feel firmly planted here.
I know exactly where I am, I just don't like it here. It's High School, it's Spokane, its everything and nothing at the same time. Are these the best years of my life? That's the saddest, most depressing question ever. One might argue that they absolutely are not, but how do you really know that? What if taking the school bus and reading shit like The Odyssey is the best time of my life? What if it never gets any better and I end up living in Spokane the rest of my life?
Maybe everything has to suck a little now. Maybe the missing piece of my puzzle is out there, beyond what I can see right now. It's past the notebook paper and the Chemistry worksheets, beyond college even. If there's happiness out there, all I want is to take a little slice for myself. Affectionately... Anna 
