  the axe fell today. basically it came down to two issues: 1) he doesn't trust me cuz of that . and he still can't get over it.
"obviously it was a mistake to get back together. " 2) we've still got diff issues on love. he thinks mine is too utopian, i think even if he doenst agree he should let be perm the counterplan (debate-speaking). as in, he should let me pursue what i want. i thought it was fine today. guess not. and to think, this all started when i told i wanted to withhold.
then i said it was because i didn't feel the same as i used to. then he was like, why did we get back together......and then it led on from there. my favorite phrase (i feel like a mahayana buddhist): "i know what i want and where i'm going. i want to know if you're coming along for hte ride, because i'd like you to. " cold? who knows. goodbye josh. i hope you have a nice life. and i hope you learn to accept this.
somethings like love, hope, and happiness can't be settled for. They're untangible, unviolable, unchangeable, and will always exist in utopia. we just have to go there. 
