  Alright... this is getting a little ridiculous. Yet another kid has coerced me into posting his one-handed jibberings. What the fuck? Not to mention the fact that this lil' bitch still didn't sign the guestbook... (hint hint) :::shaking head::: Alright fine...
I eat his food... sleep on his couch... make sweet sweet wonderful love to his mom... plus I touched my junk and then touched his face and he was all like, "whatever".... :::lack of understanding::: So I'm posting this crap. Fine. And, you know, I actually read it and it's not total nonsense so already he's got a leg up on half of my work.
I mean I should just be happy that someone else beside myself is finally writing, right?... :::grumble::: I better be getting some Spaghetti-O's out of this deal... or some scotch or something... Here it is... ...and sign the guestbook for crissakes.... --Dexter --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- (Insert responsible title here) Well, I figured it’s time to throw my hat into the intellectual foray that is this blog. Like a phoenix rising from the ashes, so did I the day of and after my birthday. (In case you can’t figure it out yet, I’m the person Dexter’s December 8 article is about) I figured it would be appropriate to discuss something that’s been irritating the hell out of me with people lately. What I am referring to, of course, is personal responsibility. Now, why is it that I have decided to bitch about this?
Was it Dexter’s talk about the yummy scrumptious babies that happen when people finish coitus? Was it the old rant on God is and does He or She exist? Well, it’s a combination of the two, complete with my own beer-battered, deep-fried, baked and blended two cents to add to the mix. Now, I realize I haven’t said anything about it right now, and I would say that I am to blame for that.
I’m the one writing it, so it’s my fault. There, personal responsibility. People nowadays are completely unwilling to own up to their own actions. In the Corporate world, look no further than Enron, the entire board denies any wrongdoing even when the evidence is thrown right in their faces. In more recent news, take a look at Martha Stewart. That bitch damn well knew she was engaging in insider trading and still she denies that she did anything wrong.
HELLO, someone high in a company tells you something that will make or break a company, and you do something with your holdings, suck it up Martha, I hope your fellow inmates will show you the true meaning of a “Christmas Bouquet.” Because of the fact that everyone sees these huge corporations dodging social responsibility, they assume that they can lie, cheat, and steal.
Let’s look at what goes on deep in the realm of Springerdom, where Ricki, and Montel, and Jerry are the lords and ladies of some perverted oligarchy where the rampant unprotected sex produces more kids than Michael Jackson could ever hope to molest. Now I’m not saying that the unprotected sex is the problem, like I said, I’m talking about personal responsibility. It doesn’t pain me to see that children are being born in this world “by accident,” whether the condom broke, she missed a pill, or the phone rang and startled you when you were going to pull out.
What bothers me about the whole thing is that the guys sometimes deny that the kid is theirs (because, let’s face it folks, the women are da hoes, right? ) or that even if they acknowledge that it is their child, they refuse to take care of him for whatever reason. That’s the bitch. Seriously, how the hell can you call yourself any form of human when you damn well know that you caused a life to come into the world, and then choose not to take care of it? I thought exposing was a relic from Ancient Greece. We’re no longer physically exposing our unwanted kids to the elements, killing the undesired off, the ones we do allow into the world are being exposed socially and emotionally.
I don’t think I could have made it 21 years without both of my parents. Does that make me weak? Maybe. However, with all seriousness, take care of your fucking kids. There’s nothing more irresponsible than not taking care of one of your own that you caused. Parents, don’t think you aren’t falling under the knife tonight. Parents are letting their kids get out of control.
They are YOUR children. Now I’m not advocating abusing kids, but I know that through discipline I learned how to take care of myself in the world. (I can just hear the bleeding hearts now about how I got spanked as a kid. Get over it. I deserved every one. ) And some advice to parents: The television is not a babysitter! Don’t just plop little Timmy down in front of the boob tube while you go out.
The flashing images on the TV is no replacement for taking little Johnny to the store with YOU, even if he is a whiny little bastard and an embarrassment to you when you can’t control him after YOU have pumped enough sugar in him that he could cause avalanches with the sound of his screams. Simply put, YOU are responsible for your kids, because they don’t know any better, and nor will they know any better unless YOU show them the way.
Let’s go back to me for a second, ‘cause I’m not immune to this either. A couple of Saturdays ago my friends got me absolutely stumbling drunk and all that to celebrate my 21st birthday. Now, let’s say for a minute that something happened that day and I ended up in the hospital, or worse, dead. Now, I in the hospital on life support from breaking ribs from vomiting so hard and having the shards cut through my stomach would undoubtedly suck ass, so I’m glad I avoided such an extreme fate.
All I had to show for it was being carried to my bed by my friends, and them wondering if I’d be ok. (See the Dec. 8 article for the details) The point is that they didn’t tell me to do anything I wasn’t already in the mindset to do. Hence, if I were to have gotten hurt, there’s no one to blame except for me. They (meaning my friends) put me in that environment, but I was definitely the one who ultimately decided to go with it.
Ergo, even if I did blame them for my getting hurt (which I wasn’t) the blame still lies with me, because I did it of my own free will. I don’t buy this whole “I was drunk so whatever I did shouldn’t count” shit. If you were stupid enough to drink so much that you did something really stupid, then you need to own up to it. In fact, any of the things that I did that I felt bad about on my birthday the appropriate people and authorities have been apologized to.
What am I getting at? Does this kid ever shut up? Yes, very soon. This whole diatribe is about one thing: Owning up to your own actions. Don’t start blaming others when things go to shit. Not every bad thing that happens to someone is a conspiracy by the Martian Council to fuck up John Q Public’s life. I’m not saying we all should be angels, but if you fucked up, and you’re called on it, then stop the bullshit and own up to it, and face the consequences.
And if you’ve just read this whole thing and are disgusted by it, you have no one to blame but yourself. ‘Til I rise from the ashes again… --Jake "The Phoenix" Kozak 
