  In the past few months, I have tried to keenly observe myself deep within, and have managed to put a lot of efforts into putting a lot of things into perspective; the things I do, the things I talk, the things I read, the things I hear and listen to; well - absolutely whatever that can practically stimulate (and stretch) my thought processes.
No, if you thought I have just finished reading one of those American "self-help" and "self-mastery" books, you are wrong. No way am I doing this to make myself a better person, as you know, I already am! Jokes apart, whether my efforts directly or indirectly affect my personality or not, is not much of my concern, but the point here is that the mere "thought" of "thinking" sort of gives me the kicks!
I cannot imagine the oh so precious minutes and hours I have lost in my life due to this "mental preoccupation" of mine. My personal feeling is that a lot of people who consider themselves fortunate enough to have known me better, seem to think that I "think" too much. And lo behold! If you happen to be the one who felt the same, you can consider yourself pretty much bang on target with your "thoughts" about me.
Thinking has become a routine way of life, sometimes helping me solve umpteen daily problems, but which also happens to be an easy way out for me to distract myself from doing other routine activities. A perfect example of late is the precious time I have spent "thinking" about music and about the books I am reading, some of the time which I could have very well utilized to do some useful research as a computer scientist (!? ), atleast for the benefit of mankind (read: my adviser), if not for myself. Yes, the phrase "thinking about music" and not just listening, is one that I have recently coined for myself.
Before you get a chance to read about my my ever-growing musical manias in one of my future blogs, you will perhaps want to (unfortunately) tread your way through torturous blogs like these. Seriously speaking, if I could write something so spontaneously, then it has to be this particular blog. Partly, because I am done with my "research" deadline for tonight, and since the near future looks exciting on the research front, I am unashamedly hitting the keyboard hard and subjecting folks to endless torture. I am repeatedly asking myself: Did I ever get so spontaneous?..Not Really, Not that I remember! *Sighs* - I wish I could write my exams even half as spontaneously as this blog and that too, without too much "thinking".
Alas! Okay, I promise to take it easy. And agreed! I also sound a tad "philosophical" here, atleast the initial part of this blog appears to be like it, or whatever purists wish to call it. But that ain't quite true, even though I see a few raised eye-brows already. I have begun reading Ayn Rand stuff of late ("The Fountainhead" to be specific), but hold on; give me a few more weeks before you and I start discussing objectivity and philosophy (in case you are interested, that is).
When it comes to Rand's carefully carved out yet immensely strong characters, I do not wish to take the risk and jump the gun too soon and offer my expert comments and opinions yet. I have to admit though, that it's a terrific read; the first couple hundred pages have been one of the best I have ever put my hands (and mind) on. Rand's style is not only highly unique but considering the timeline of the book (1942? ), it is even more spellbinding. It has to be read with a certain frame of mind though, only then will it appeal to the reader in an appropriate way.
Again, the word "appropriate" is so delicate here. I have talked to quite a few people, who have read this book long before I even knew such a book existed, and everybody seems to have contrasting opinions. And my friend, therein lies the secret! I know of no book which holds so much substance in the characters it potrays. And the mere fact that this so called "substance", appeals differently to different people, is interesting in itself!
This is no "what-will-happen-next" kind of novel. I do not have the exact words as yet to really categorize and sum up the book in a nice way (talk about "spontaniety"!! ), but as of now, I can make some of my claims anyways. It looks like poeple either tend to appreciate this book a LOT (to the extent of it being HIGHLY INFLUENTIAL, to say the least), or they feel its almost TRASHY (to the extent that people seem to lose their basic thirst for "reading" books after reading it)!.
Now both seem to be extremes for me. But since the book is enough fodder for my "thinking" grey cells, I still love it, nevertheless. Again, Rand's writing is special, in the sense that the book actually gained more recognition and popularity in the modern times, from whatever I hear and understand. That's because even though it was written in the old times, it identifies itself with the present so well.
It almost seems like Ayn Rand is prophesying how future generations of mankind will come into existence, even though fiction works like these are more or less on the unrealistic side. Rand writes these different shades of characters and leaves the readers themselves to interpret them. To me, the way she describes her "philosophy" through her characters, without actually making the reader get into the "theory of philosophy", is awesome. Since the reader is free to draw his/her own conclusions, (and could perhaps essentially carve out his/her own philosophy through the book), it makes for a truly wonderful read.
One thing's for sure. You will most probably yearn for your pillow and hit the bed pretty soon, if you begin reading this after a long hard day at work. (*Sheepish grin* - 'cause I did, after reading the Intro!). But the stubborn reader that I am, I'm glad I diligently stuck to the book. I have just realized that I have missed my dinner insulin shot tonight - *Kicks himself*. Research, followed by Blogging, backed up by my concept of "thinking", can be a deadly combination.
And if I continue my spontaneous writings like today, without disciplining myself and my diet, I might soon need an insulin drip or something, to keep myself aware of this hormonal need. But since I can proudly thump my chest and say that "Diabetes meri mutthi mein hain", I need not be alarmed. I almost forgot that I am happily neglecting my series of diabetes chronicles. Its time I posted the second chapter. Didn't a Santa or Banta someone Singh write when asked about the past tense of the word 'think': "I thought, I thought, I thought and then I wrote 'thunk'"!...?
So much for the torture... 
