  I'm scared. Terrified. The hour of my doom grows closer every second and there's nothing I can do to deflect time's arrow. I downloaded a Sleater-Kinney song last night and read an article by Lisa Crystal Carver this morning. I should have known better. I've been infected with the dreaded girl-germ now. In the Narcognomickon of Abdulla Al-Jazrad, the Mad Arab has this to say of the girl-germ: 'From deathless aeons, in dimensions unknown to mere mortals, comes the direfull girl-germ. It's sigil is the pink heart, and it may be summoned unbeknownst by the most hapless of mortal males with distressing ease. Once invoked, it can not be dismissed by The Conjuration "XILQA XILQA BESA BESA" or any other spell normally efficacious against eldritch powers. There is no cure and no escape. Only pain, madness and the duplicitious release of death...' Alissthere Crawling, a more recent adept of the black arts, describes the course of this deadly infestation in his Book of Flies: 'The girl-germ passes into your brain through your eyes while you are reading chick lit, incubates for about 6 weeks, sucking up your brain juices and growing in size until one day, with a sickening rending of bone and tissue, your skull is cleaved apart from within and out comes - a girl!!!
Her name is BABALON and she is Nuit. Do what thou will! ' I am doomed. Pity me, and learn from my dire fate. I can feel the pressure building, vile forces pressing out from within my cranium...Ssalmani-ia ina bi'sha duri tapxa-a duppira...Ssalmani-ia ana GISHBAR tapqida duppira...Barra! Barra!...Akhkharu Dingir Xul...arghhhhhhhhh ~apologies to HP Lovecraft and all other injured parties~ 
