  currently listening to: slipknot - duality "...(i push my fingers into my) eyes, it's the only thing that slowly stops the ache..." i can't even begin to tell you how much i wanted to just runaway from work today. suffice to say it wasn't the best day's work (if there can be such a thing) i've ever had. and not a word of thanks for all my efforts either.
but i suppose being paid is thanks enough. maybe? anyway, i'm feeling a lot more positive about things now. the self-destruct mood didn't materialise after all. ok, so i'm twenty-five and still living at home. but it's my only option for the time being, so i should stop worrying about it and see the advantages of it instead. and yes, i've got a degree and choose to work in a shop at the zoo. but that won't last forever (i'll be unemployed by the end of the year) and the world can be my oyster if i want it to be.
and yeah, there are many things i'd like to change/obtain/do/see/experience/be, but i am still young. and there can't be many people in this world who don't feel the same way about themselves from time to time. and there are people worse off than me. i shouldn't ever forget that . oh, listen to me! pay no attention to my ramblings.
just know that i'm smiling a lot these days. and i'm happier than i have been in a long time :-) and i did try to care that england got knocked out of euro 2004. i really did. but it seems that years of conditioning by my scottish family (especially my dad) have finally paid off. and i'm not as english as i sometimes think i am. still, it would have been great for us/them* to win something. but, what will be will be. *depending on whether i ultimately class myself as being english or scottish.
maybe i'll never settle that one... 
