  Knock It Up A Notch. As far as the cool points poll is concerned, the only person to closely identify last weeks question was not eligible for the list, although he is quite cool. So here is this week's question: You can recieve a scholaship for knowing what made up language?
This question is worth three (3) cool points. I haven't seen any dead bodies this week, but it's only Monday so we won't count out the possibility just yet. The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King sweeps at the Oscars. 11 noms, 11 wins. Way to go Peter Jackson and Co. Nobody has swept since 1988 (The Last Emperor) and before that it was 1958 (Gigi). They also tied an Academy Award record with 11 statues. In 1997 Titanic won 11 and in 1958 Ben-Hur won 11. I'm glad that fantasy can finally be seen as a viable genre now. I know that the three films combined to make over 2.5 billion (worldwide) at the box office, and probably several hundred million more in DVD sales - but nobody really wants to take the chance and spend 100 mill making the movie right in fear that they won't make their money back.
Now that this movie kicked ass and took names at the Oscars, I feel that we'll continue to see the fantasy genre flourish, at least that's my hope. I love me some wizards and dragons and fucking swords and shit. Now that we have that out of the way let me move onto the reason I'm pissed at the Motion Picture Academy. Sean Penn wins best actor?! Who was smoking what when they doled out that special little piece of torture upon america? I don't want anyone to think I'm biased here, but how in the fuck do you not only pass up Johnny Depp, but also Bill Murray? I wonder if they even watched these fucking movies? Johnny Depp may have given the single best performance ever as Captain Jack Sparrow, and if were giving out sympathy-been-shunned-one-too-many-times Oscars (in the case of Penn) then why not give it to Bill Murray? His body of work is far superior to Sean Penn's. I blame fucking Russell Crowe for the whole goddamn thing. Sean Penn should have won it for I Am Sam, but they had to give it to Crowe for Gladiator, which was a fine picture to be sure, but did you see I Am Sam?
Penn was brilliant. All Crowe did was bring a strong presence to an otherwise prosaic role. If Penn had won like he was supposed to, then you can bet your ass Johnny Depp or Bill Murray wins last night. While we are on the subject, there is no way that Charlize Theron was better in Monster than Naomi Watts was in 21 Grams. No. Fucking. Way. And I like Charlize. But Naomi was off the fucking chart. And she gets robbed like a Times Square hooker.
Oh well, at least that's not as depressing as Bill and Johnny getting robbed. That was a crime. A crime, I tell you! But I digress. The Yellow Dart has spoken. "I'll read you poetry, I'll tell you what I know to be true // I'll make a sentimental observation 'bout the moon // I'll kiss you so that you can think that kisses are sublime // But I won't spend a penny, cause all that your worth is my time. " 
