  Oh Jeff - What a mess - I must confess... A letter that will never be written, a poem never heard, a song never sung. I thought I could do this - thought I could outlast this stark reality that I never even wanted.
I can't come home like this - this is a mess - MY mess... I still love him, even while he hates me, even while this all falls apart around me more and more with every breath I exhale. I can't stand hearing him laugh with Abby while I sit beside the ugly green-eyed monster. I can't explain this without causing a fight - a further rift between two people already so far apart. I wanted to be the first to move on, but when he doesn't even care that I'm standing still, what's the point? It's time to admit that I just can't do this - I'm failing out, dropping out... falling off. I don't want to be the forgotten "princess" in someone else's limelight.
I don't want to be the outsider, the third wheel in my house ! I built here, let people in, made it theirs... and I still know its mine - but now I can't take it back. Another mess I've made, uncleanable, unimaginable... PAINFUL - and I'm alone in this misery... 
