  post-holiday diet meltdown lunch Come home for lunch cranky and irritated. Look in the freezer...yep, all those friggin' diet meals are still there, though the supply has diminished some over the last couple of weeks.
Grab the first one within reach. Doesn't matter what kind, natch, because you've already had all the varieties at least twice. Open the box and cut a slit in the film cover. On your way to the microwave, spot the Wavy Lay's Hidden Valley Ranch flavor chips. Put meal into microwave, set timer for 6 1/2 minutes. Before closing the door all the way, sneak one chip out of the bag.
Mmmmm. Eat a few more and contemplate the meal in the microwave. Casually stroll into the bathroom, weigh yourself, and reconfirm that you've still got two pounds to go until you reach your goal. Return to the microwave. After a moment, say firmly: "Fuck it!". Take the meal out of the microwave, replace the meal in the box, and return the box to the freezer. Continue eating the Wavy Lay's without counting and be sure to wash them down with a Diet Coke. 
