  A man takes his beagle to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed -- is there anything you can do for him? " "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look. " So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says "I'm going to have to put him down. " "What? Because he's cross-eyed? " "No, because he's really heavy. " 
