  Well it's a brand new year. Hopefully I can do something with this one. I faxed my resume in for two jobs, and I got a call about two other jobs. So hopefully one of those will work out. Of course if I get a job, that means I will have to reset my sleeping schedule.
Either that or get me a night job. I don't know what's up with me. Last night, Scott went and got us some tacos and french fries. Just what I needed at 2:00 in the morning. It was good though. New Years pretty much sucked. Shelly highlighted my hair, and we played Scrabble. I know, we partied like rockstars! Can't help it. It was a little depressing, but I just told myself it was another night. I am just glad the holidays are over. I just realized last night that I really miss my family. I don't know what hit me all of a sudden, but I was laying on the couch last night, and I just started crying.
But ya know, that's because I jinxed myself on the crying thing. I told Shelly that I realized that I haven't cried once since I broke up with John. And then what do I do? I cry. Oh well. But I called my mom on Wednesday, and I realized that I have the best mom in the world. Thank goodness she is willing to help me or I would be screwed. She sent me all of my credit card bills, but told me to let her know if I need help and she will put the money in my checking. And I am going to see about getting a loan to pay them all off, so I can have just one payment. Yeah that's a broken record. I have done that three times already. I have a problem. But I think I have realized that I need to chill with the shopping.
But then I have this other problem. I have been stressing myself out so much, and I have lost some weight, and now a lot of my clothes are just too big, but Shelly said I buy my shirts too big anyway. So anyway, not that I am complaining, but I might have to buy a few things.... But in the words of Shelly's mom Kathy, I need to relax and enjoy my life.
I'm trying. But I will admit, I am a worrier. Last night I actually cooked. It's not that I didn't think I could cook, it's just I hate cooking for just myself. It's easier to throw in a Tombstone. But I guess I kind of like to cook. I just hate cleaning up afterward. I need to make some friends here. The three of us don't really know where to go out, or where to get good mexican food, or good breakfast. I would like to find a nice park, where I can just go sit sometimes, if I need to relax or get out of the house, or just want to sit and read a book.
But I guess those are things I will find in time. Oh yeah, and we went to Target the other night, and I love that place, as you all know. But one thing that completely depressed me was all the Valentine's Day stuff in my face. Don't get me wrong, I love hearts, and all that crap, I used to draw them all the time, but I can't take it. I don't already know that I am all alone and that no one loves me, let's throw all this mushy crap out and remind me. I don't mean NO ONE loves me, but you know what I mean. I am not going to get into all that though. I just keep thinking it's better to be alone than to be with someone who disrespects you and treats you like crap. Alright, I am rambling on and on. I am going to check out some jobs. 
