  Everyone has up and gone to school and now I'm left here all alone. Today is the first day of school for a lot of people and it's weird not going. I've been in this routine for how many years? Now, 17 years later, I'm not doing it anymore. It's really weird.
I should be headed off to some inane class listening to some boring professor spout out stuff that I really could care less about. Then there's almost always that one class, that special class, that I fall in love with. It's almost always an elective that makes me want to change my major, like creative writing or choir (back when I was a freshman, when I loved it, not choir as a senior, when I hated it). I miss singing too. God, I'm all alone now and nobody cares about me. (I know, it's all about me. ) There's nobody around for me to hang out with and I hate it. Instead I am working some stupid-ass mcjob because I can't do any better; because I fucked around in college and couldn't get that killer internship; because I was too obsessed with grades and nothing else; because I didn't like most of the people in the professional organizations or I just didn't know about them, so I didn't join. God, I am such a screw-up. I'm such a failure. I have no friends to hang out with and no real job.
I'm all alone and I hate it. I wish someone would kill me. I hate living. I want to die, seriously. It's not like anyone would care anyway. I don't hang out with anyone anymore so it's not like anyone would mourn me. So what's stopping me? I should just take the knife and slit my wrists right now. I hate myself. I hate my situation. I hate my life. I wish Kate and I could trade places. She's only been at school one day and she hates it.
She can come back home and I can go back, where my old friends are. I don't even think that most of them are my friends anymore. They won't talk to me. I never thought I'd say this when I was an undergrad, but I miss college so much, you have no idea. Please, God, put me out of my misery. 
