  Today’ s weird dream.  It was somewhat a foretelling of events.  My dad was there and several corrupt cops were there.
 I was in the lower down trodden sector of a city that resembled manila.  Crowded,  Dirty and Dark,  there was a gray haze that gave me a very depressed impression.  I was trying to go undercover and infiltrate this private army.  It was scary in a sense cause I had to almost do what they did.  It was easy to talk big…  anybody can do it,  and preaching to the choir was a small specialty of mine.  I was getting with in the organization till they started asking me to get a gun.
 They were asking for some hard identification and some money.  Money wasn’ t a problem…  the guns were surprisingly cheap…  but fake ids that would stand was.  I didn’ t want them to find out who my family was through who I really was.  I don’ t plan on living long but I plan on ending it all with a bang.  Then the setting of the dream struck me silly as it began to rain and I noticed how corrupt and polluted with moral feces the world was.
 It was depressing and I thought that I might as well join all that tried before me in death.  MY BOOK ( I and my partner’ s book)  I got to study history in detail with the research of my book.  When you become a hero…  you suffer and so does your family.  A real hero suffers because his actions ripple an affect all their loved ones.
 When your family suffers cause of you it makes the suffering much greater.  I have a character in the story named Tadeo…  Thadeus… or the Saint of Hopeless circumstance.  In the story that is part of the book…  his uncle is outwardly a manupilative old man who uses him as a go between.  Unfortunately his uncle usually gets him in situations that would kill him or any layman…  there is one thing that makes Tadeo survive…
 Not love…  Not duty or Obedience…  But Guilt Tadeo was married when he was 14,  to a beautiful young orphan his uncle got to buy his complete and unconditional loyalty…  Unfortunately,  that’ s not how you have a relationship…  it twists it turns and I leave enough to keep the book interesting…  he now does dangerous errands for his uncle…  How does he survive…  well,  there must be a reason to survive for a character given the turbulence of the age where people backstabbed people left and right…
 The fall of the Philippines came from the hands of traitors more than any other foreign force.  Ha ha read the book :  THE MATRIX Well…  it ended…  it wasn’ t that great but it ended.  BTW I’ m writing this cause I choose to write it…  and I know the full degree of what my actions will cause.  Superman fight was cool…  but under the context that they are programs and programmers able to manipulate the code then why wasn’
t the most dramatic part of the fight done with more physical power.  I can’ t fairly judge it cause its undertones is pretty new age and I’ m an LOTR guy.  LOTR is not new age to me…  its about war and human trials…  Matrix is something that I can’ t get cause the movie looses its message when its being to cryptic.  Its not an overestimation of the audiece’ s IQ.  Its just targeting the wrong market and expecting the wrong things from that market.
