  I feel i can make hair dye puns now that my grey patches are becoming less "patchy". (And, no, I'm not going to change it even if The Mirror have the same headline). Anyway I'm not going to say that much, but here's the A-MOL Euro 2004 Awards . Enjoy! Team Of The Tournament: Greece No surprise really. They are a basically a bunch of mediocre players brought together to become a formidable unit.
Player Of The Tournament: Traianos Dellas The Greeks built themselves around a solid defence, and this guy was the cornerstone. Strong, pretty nippy and has good distribution. To think he played for Sheffield United. Other players I’d consider for this are Carvalho and Baros. Goal Of The Tournament: Jon Dahl Tomasson vs Sweden Maniche, Rooney, Ibrahimovic and Heinz all scored some beauties, but this dipping, curling, long range half-volley was the best. Game Of The Tournament: England vs Portugal People say Holland vs Czech Rep was a better game, but the first quarter-final had all the drama you needed.
A quick start, comebacks from both team, controversy over a (rightly) disallowed goal and a penalty shootout. What more can you ask? Well, apart from a win. Best Piece Of Commentary: John Motson “Koller and Stam look alike, having similar haircuts… not that they have hair.” Best Piece Of Punditry: Ian Wright “I’m a little dreadlocked teapot” – Wrighty brilliantly describing Edgar David’s ineffectual goal line defending. Worst Team Of The Tournament: Germany Four years ago, a scrappy 1-0 win against them for England was an achievement. Now, they lose to a Czech reserve team.
Worst Player Of The Tournament: Raul Lazy, useless, disinterested. No one from Real Madrid had a good tournament, apart from Figo, who they’ve already said they are willing to let go. Worst Miss Of The Tournament: Ivica Mornar vs France Two minutes left, drawing with France, he gets the ball four yards from goal with Barthez stranded. Amazingly blazes over. Worst Game Of The Tournament: Croatia vs Switzerland Having to go on what I’ve heard really, but since Radio 5 managed to go through nearly 90 minutes without mentioning the game on the pitch, you’d have to say it was pretty dull. Worst Piece Of Commentary: Clive Tyldesly Apparently managed to mention Manchester Utd.
36 times in the Czech Rep. Vs Greece Semi Final, with no Man U players in the game. We all know how this happens though. “A late substitution here, and I can think of another game with a late substitution…” Worst Piece Of Punditry: Ian Wright While Tony Adam’s opinions have now passed into legend (“The best way for us to win against Croatia is to drop Rooney…” “James can prove himself a legend in a penalty shootout”), Ian Wright has to be applauded for condemning Urs Meier’s decision against England while simultaneously refusing to watch a replay “because it’s too painful”. Biggest Ponce Of A Player I Still Fucking Hate: Christiano Ronaldo He might have been a bit handy at times, but in the final, he showed at least twice his ability to continue with the fucking step-overs when something like a side-footed pass or a blind toe-poke would have been a better option. Runner Up: David Beckham = Oh, and here's a picture that I reckon about two people will understand... 
