  One day last year, when TFMrs and I were lazing about the flat, she decided she was bored and wanted to go somewhere.
She threw open a map of Yorkshire and pointed to a geographical feature called "Brigham Rocks", somewhere above Harrogate. Since it was 4pm, I said this was a very crap idea. So, we didn’t go that day, but every so often, she decides she wants to go when we have a free day. My main problems with such a visit are: - The Rocks are probably well off the very thin, spindly roads that appear on the map, and may involve walking.
I have no problems with this, per se, but when it’s drizzling and cold outside, it’s just not worth it. - TFMrs always suggest this visit when she has a day off. What she forgets is that she often sleeps past 2pm when she has a day off. - She picked it when making an overdramatic, flouncy point. So, yesterday, at 1pm, guess where TFMrs decides she wants to go.
So I had a quick decision to make – a trip to the middle of fucking nowhere, or distract her by increasing our debt in the name of matrimony. So, on the Monday after the wedding, we are off on honeymoon to urlLink Greece a week. So, the plan for the wedding weekend or so is this: Thurs – Pick up suits and various gubbings. Head down to Spalding Fri – Sort out various last minute stuff. Rehearsal. Meet up with everyone at hotel.
Few drinks, Euro 2004 preview program Sat – Have argument with Dan about how he said his chest was only 29" and it’s his own damned fault. Church etc… Sun – Head back home. Watch England v France (unsure of order) Mon – Return suits; explain tears in Dan’s jacket. Head to Manchester Airport. Realise this is my first trip on a plane since September 11th, 2001. Freak out at first sight of turban. Tue - Land in Corfu = Go see Shaun Of The Dead! Now! = Generally, apart from sorting out the suits, seeing Shaun Of The Dead (like you should – NOW!
) and giving money to Airtours, not much has been happening. Football has going from liking me on Saturday, with a win over Blackburn, to hating me on Monday (it’s no good if everyone is getting good results at the bottom), so I’ll have to see how it feels about me today (v Everton, Leicester v Man U). I think I’m getting bored of Beckham and his extra-marital ****ing, though the absolutely cringe-worthy interview on Ant and Dec’s show with Posh, recorded two weeks earlier, was entertaining.
I have to prepare for my interview on Thursday, and I’m just resigning myself to admitting that I have no knowledge of biology since I haven’t studied it for nigh on 9 years. Still, as long as I don’t come out with anything too stupid or mention my problems with the Grimsby police back in my caretaking days, I’m sure I should be okay. 
