  Before I start - urlLink a pretty good rexamination of The Matrix Reloaded . Will Helm is pretty great, and it's worth checking out the archives at the bottom for his stuff on other shitty films. I had a thought last night, so bare with me. It's about David Beckham. The poor fella has had a rough time, what with his (alleged) affair with his PA, his shitty second half of a season at Real Madrid, his lazy performances for England and his inability to hit an 8 foot by 8 yard target from 12 yards away. Yesterday, someone decided to take his frustration with Beckham's Euro 2004 half-assing by vandalising a urlLink photo of him (£7,500 for a photo?
What is it - his wedding?). "Beckham and Meier, you loosers" was daubed on in red ink. To quote the Beeb - "The misspelling of 'losers' may have been a reference to Rebecca Loos, whose claims of an affair with Beckham made headlines earlier this year" . You see, my thinking, mainly because he's still blaming the ref for doing his job, is that the extra 'o' is due to the guy being thick as fuck. Beckham has blamed his performance on Real's training methods. There is a possible case, due to the general shitiness of Zidane, Raul and other Real players (though Raul Bravo's bad form is thought to be down to him being crapper than Ian Harte).
Rather brilliantly, Beckham has fucked off his bosses with this claim, which can't help when they already want to offload (and Chelsea no longer interested. Ooops! Odds on the usual 'star player has shit year for one of the Milan clubs' story?). The president, Perez, came out with the following: We understand your concerns, David. We agree with you that your training was not up to it. But who did not train at all during the Christmas break? Who keeps flying back to England when asked to rest? " Why am I bringing this up? France v England, 13th June 2004.
Sitting in front of Danny Wragg's TV. "Is it me, or does Beckham look a bit tubbier than usual? " This observation, made in the anthem, was laughed down ("Yeah, he's a right fat bastard! "), being a bit of my patented Beckham hatred (I hated him before it was cool - Youth Cup Final 1994. Little twat stays on wing, flicks his hair, moans, does fuck all, acts like a big star, finishes on lo'o'sing side [see what I did there]). However, it may have to be said that I was right! Dave and his club think he's unfit, so he odds are that he's put on a bit of extra layering. So, to Danny Wragg, Charlotte Wragg, Little Bob, Chris Dickens and Vanessa: "Ha ha! Fuck off! " Meant in the nicest possible way of course :o) 
