  Well, it's over. Yeah, done with. No more Tyke and Tina. No chance of it happening in this lifetime. She called me back. It was 8:03 PM on Tuesday, December 23, 2003.
The time my heart finally got shattered. We talked for 9 minutes and 52 seconds. She called me from her house phone. Right from when I answered it was awkward. She asked me about my CE and then we talked about that for a little. Then she got to the letter.
She told me she was blown away. Absolutely blown away. It was nothing she had expected. People had told her that I had a crush on her but she never expected it to be this much. And then she just flat out said that we are friends and nothing more. She cannot think of me that way.
It is troubling for her but it is true. I am a great guy but not for her. And I will be honest with you. This fucking hurt. Bam! I like you but not like that is all I could think about.
I am not the guy for her. Then we talked about other things like how she wanted to know what she could do and she kept asking me what she could do. But there is absolutely nothing she could do. I only wanted one thing. She couldn't give it to me so it wouldn't be enough for her to do anything else. Of course she wants to stay friends.
Great friends. And she hopes, actually she commands, that we do not make it awkward. She told me that we would not talk about it. We can't make it awkward. She wanted to make sure that she wasn't leading me on or being a tease. I assured her she wasn't.
Then we just tried to resume our normal relationship. She wanted to make sure that I wasn't going to become anti-Kaley but how can I do that? Just because she will never love me doesn't mean that I am going to automatically stop loving her. I am still going to come to her bball games and make her signs if I can. But nothing will ever come of that. So we will be friends.
And nothing more. It hurts. So bad. I can't tell you what this is like. The pain is almost unbearable but I know I have to start up with my normal actions again. She is still a part of me but I just have to get over it.
I put my heart out and got rejected. So now I must take this closure and grow from it. This has to be a learning experience for me. Hopefully it won't make me timid or anything like that. I need to stay strong. Damnit, how?
Why? Damnit. It hurts. What do I do from here? How will it become normal again? I can't continue with this.
I need to get out of here. Hopefully I can get some time away from things at Unger's. Ok, here I go. My first step on a new path for me. My life will be different now. I can no longer be known simply as the girl in love with Kaley.
I need something new. Tyke Turner is out on the town. Hear him growl. Grrr. (I am trying to be funny but it is hard) Goodbye. 
