  As urlLink recent events have shown, the United States GDP is rising. Or spiking. Democrats squirm.
Rebulicans laughs manically. You must ask yourself though... where are our youth in this picture? Does measuring the amount of money exchanging hands really tell us if our economy has given rise to the comfort and stability of the common man? I implore you to ponder over urlLink this article from an Atlantic Monthly. Why do the two major parties value this relic from the stone age of the depression so highly?
Thus, I, Ackmed, purpose a new system. A number between 1 and 100 will be given out by the Satiricist council, and this number will tell the common-folk are doing econimically and psychologically. The units will be known as "Kutlar. " With the current administration in power, many analysts would give the average to be at most 40 Kutlar. However, these analysts high up within the party have shown that if a Satirical party member were to take the reigns of control into their own hands, this number would increase exponentially, and some guess that the rating system may even have to change to account for the dramtic increase in general population happiness, well-being, and economical status.
Until then, fellow member, I ask thee, spread the word of Satiricism. Not one step back. That is all. This is Ackmed, once again, and thus I bid thee farewell. "People will think what I tell them to think! " urlLink Charles Foster Kane 
