  wow wen the stress is gone all ur left w/is emptiness! i seem to b quite the complainer, especially wen it comes to stress, but i've realized, that that's all my life is...busyness. so y complain? y try to rid myself of it? if it's wut i do well, if it's wut makes me happy...y try to rid myself of it? i mean, it's like my life has no real purpose anymore, it used to, i used to b totally on God, all the time, that's wen i was soo happy, and it's not that im not happy now, it's just that im distant. i mean, it seems like wen i have down time, wen things r dull, i have nothing at all to do, and rather do wut i need to do, rather than spend that time w/God, i find something insignificant to do (actually really, i end up spending time on this hunk of machine) strange that my life is so on and off, im a light switch, really! its like wen im on, i give it my all, and im all over, doing everything i can, doing my best, but wen im off, i don't have a job, and it's awfully dark.
i can't stand dark, dark makes me think of evil, of life w/o God of scary scary times. and light, well light is luv and happiness, and comfort, it's God, right there, next to u. it's funny, no matter how distant i become, he's always there, it's not like i left, or he left, we just don't say much, i try to ignore him, but he'll always b there, waiting for me.
no matter wut, i always come back, no matter wut i think is more important, i always no its really not, and everytime i think that i no best, he puts me right back in my place and really...that's the best times, wen im humbled, wen i realize how much i need him...wen i think about wut my life would b like w/o that relationship.
it'd b pretty dull, pretty sad, depressing and dark. i luv my music, i luv my family, but it's that agape luv that is for the Lord, unconditional, everlasting, pure love, ya, i'll do other things, ya, i'll luv other people and things, ya, things'll get bad and good, but he never changes,no matter wut, no matter how much the world around me changes, no matter how much i change, he doesn't, he's the same for eternity past and eternity future. and that's how i like it changedfish 
