  Slowly coming back to that comfortable place where things can just be;  it's quiet again and almost calm. nbsp;  Had a good night of impressive speeches ( you keep getting better,  Mr.
 Kerry;  keep it up)  a satisfying leftover turkey pesto sandwich from Tuesday's great& nbsp; night out with Calamity Jane,  mini yoga session (
working on getting the bod back to where it was a month ago)  and a round of nearly- forgotten evening pages. nbsp;  Before long,  I'll retire to the futon with Book 5 to find out just what the woes of Mrs.
 Weasley are;  they'll be fit for storytelling,  I'm sure. nbsp;  But the blog- bug has been gnawing at the back of my mind all day,
 even though I don't really know what to say.  Think I figured out why the last few days have been so. off. nbsp;  Well,  there are the obvious reasons:
nbsp;  last week,  being back from vacation,  realizing that school starts in less than a month. nbsp;  But I realized this morning (
during morning pages,  no less)  that the change,  end,  old/ new path intersection,
 etc.  came when I wasn't looking. nbsp;  The Boy and I talked about it on our day of recovery after Pride. nbsp;  This feeling that something was wrapping up,
 coming to a close,  making way for something else,  something new. nbsp;  And somewhere& nbsp;
after& nbsp; the days full of emptiness and before the fields finished changing colors,  it did. nbsp;  I just thought the transition would be so subtle,
 I would look up one day and realize " Hey! nbsp;  It's here! nbsp;  The new path.
and I'm already on it! nbsp;  Didn't think it'd hit when I smelled fall on the yellowing wheat on the drive back. nbsp;  It's not as though the 'something new' has just landed at the door,  unannounced and expecting a meal.
nbsp;  I still feel like I'm at the top of the hill,  looking around,  taking a rest between rounds,  enjoying the view and the pause. nbsp;
 But it's time to start thinking about the trip down. nbsp;  And what made the return more jarring than usual was not getting the chance to feel the wrapping up,  the closing of everything behind,  not being able to say goodbye. nbsp;
 It was suddenly over,  and while it's not entirely gone,  it's too far away to see my wave. nbsp;  But if the last few years have taught me anything,  it's that I can't try to force what is into what was.
nbsp;  Comparing the two is out,  too. nbsp;  The only thing to do is to keep moving forward. nbsp;
 Because the other thing I've learned is that even though changes and new beginnings can be scary and difficult,  they can also be a lot of fun and hold great gifts behind their backs. nbsp;  So I'll sit here a bit longer,  watching the skies darken a bit earlier,  maybe finish another book or two,
 and will think about coming down another day. nbsp;
