  I told you guys that new dreams were being birthed in me. And the old dreams are being redefined. Guess it's time to dream with y'all! Lately, I've been in this sleeping mode. God's been allowing me to rest and recuperate from the MAJOR spiritual battles I've gone through in these past 4 years.
(MAN! I just realized it's been 4 years of constant battle! I hadn't really thought about how long I've been going through all this! ) And now, He's calling me to wake up. When I got home from St. Louis, I was still on this mega high of wanting to use what I'd learned and get out on the streets to save the world, one girl at a time! And then Mom got sick. And Jason came back. And I started ANOTHER internship program. And I had no money OR car...
I became overwhelmed and lost the zeal I'd come home with. I got busy again, losing myself in the duties of being a servant only and not a daughter of God. I thought throwing myself into the work of being a servant would peove to everyone where I was at spiritually. This was a BIG problem for me with Rob. Coming into the New Castle Dream Center, I was admittedly cocky and assumed I knew what I was doing.
WRONG!!!!! I'd learned integrity in my work ethic, but I didn't learn how to rest and just shine. I didn't and DON'T need to prove myself through works anymore. People see that I will work to the best of my ability in whatever is put before me. Now, people need to see me glow for Jesus. One of my spiritual mothers from my old church saw me a couple of months ago and noticed I'd gotten quiet.
Well, she described it as not lighting up like the 600 watt light bulb she remembered. Ouch!!!!!!!!! I thought, 'I've only just gotten back from St. Louis!!! I should be glowin in the stinkin dark! I've earned it, haven't I? ' (Paradigms keep shifting, thank God. ) Wow. Talk about needing to re-evaluate where I was at! (Will the evaluation process ever end? ) Where exactly did I lose that glow? And why? Well, I got busy, and that's when I noticed the definite change. Not only was I busy, but I was worried. Do daughters get worried about what their daddy is making and if there will be food on the table?
NO!!!! I don't think so. So, why was I worrying about all the unnecessaries in my life? Sure, I thought the situations needed to be resolved and IMMEDIATELY! But I forgot... IT'S NOT ABOUT ME!!!!!! OR MY TIMING!!!! You are asking, 'what does this have to do with dreams? ' I'll tell you. After I realized I wasn't glowing, I asked God what it would take to get that glow back again.
What does He then do? He takes out everything that's in me, (rather painful process) and slowly begins to put back in me only those things He wants. Yes, I will be a firebrand for God again, but the fire I had had too much of "Anna-Spirit" and not the Holy Spirit. Yes, I will be a prayer warrior, but He wanted to make sure I could even concentrate on ONLY those things He wanted me to pray about and not make my prayer time into a worry session.
My friend Christy (you don't know her) had a vision God gave her about me. She said that she saw me and then I turned into a glass half-full with water. She then saw the hand of God pour me completely out and throw me, the whole cup, into a huge bucket overflowing with water. That's exactly what He's doing now!!!!! (It's cool to see the things He's shown me and other saints coming to fruition.
) And just how is this redefining my old dreams and giving me new dreams? What I'd thought of as FOR SURE things which God gave me and ended up twisting to my own understanding were taken completely away from me so God could give them back to me in the pure form He intended. Woohooo!!!! Painful process, but AWESOME! And now!!!! He's giving me new dreams and old dreams with a new twist. This is cool, guys! The girls' home? I don't know just yet. God is still taking the "Anna" out of it and hasn't given it back just yet.
But I'll let you know as soon as I find out more details! 
