  All of the talk about new living pods over at Waterbones has me thinking about the best apartment I ever lived in. Now in some ways, the best apartment I ever lived in was the first one that I ever rented on my own.
It was a single in Temescal and while the kitchen was literally three feet wide, it was my first home. But that apartment is full of different stories. PimpDaddySkippy and I were barely pregnant when we looked at the place on Colby. I was in charge of the landlord wooing and once she found out that I taught college kids about sex at SFSU, we were family.
She was a wonderful, large lesbian with a hearty beard and an epileptic dog. She and her girlfriend practiced their bull whip skills in our backyard and she invited me to my first militant lesbian seder (I was, in fact, invited to join the man-free organic farming compound in Idaho that these women ran--which was sweet, really). The apartment was beautiful and small (very small). We loved that place with its big trees and sweet neighbors. We had the beautiful gay men in the front apartment who gardened every weekend and took me with them to Berkeley Bowl to buy fresh cheap produce.
We had the art school kiddies that loved Elton John and made mosaic furniture for fun. But mostly, we had Shoshana. Shoshana had the loudest sex I have ever heard. Screams, moans, furniture breaking--it was hard core stuff happening over in her bungalow across the yard from us. One night, I got a phone call around 10pm from Shoshana, talking quietly. She wanted to ask me a sex question, but needed to do it in a small voice so God wouldn't hear.
Or at least that's what she told me. "Jake,um, when I have sex, sometimes I pee...is that normal? " "You mean, pee after? " "No. During" "During sex? " "Yes" "Do you do it when you orgasm or just randomly? " "I think its when I orgasm, its hard to tell.." "Oh. Well, are you sure its pee? " "Jake, I am not a man. " "No, I know that Shoshana, but women ejaculate sometimes and its not pee. " "Well, what the hell is it then? " "I don't know, but women do it. " "But I do it...a lot. " "What does that mean, Shoshana?
" "A lot of stuff comes out. " "A cup? " "It soaks the futon. " "Oh, well that is a lot. But I think its fine as long as you don't get dehydrated and you feel ok afterwards. " "Really? " "I'm not a doctor, but I have certainly known women that have experienced what you are and its totally normal.
Though I think you should thrown out the futon. " "Yeah, you're probably right. " This opened up a floodgate (no pun intended) of questions about sex from her and her partner, which was fine. We had a great time talking about sexual politics and gender issues and how to safely clean sex toys.... But ultimately, we had to move into a cheaper apartment. And so we left Shoshana and her epileptic dog and her screams and her fabulous hummus. But I miss it sometimes. 
