  Wow! Ok here follows some events of yesterday, June 3, 2004. The day of the recital. I was completely flipping out. It crept upon me silently. I did not know my piano piece!
Yeah, I know! That's what I said too. So I went up to the church to practice on a piano that was actually in tune! HA! Not a very pretty site, I must comment. Or would it be sound?
Ok so yeah. By now I'm really scared, because like 20 minutes ago I played it great at home. But not now! So here it is, the day of the recital, and I can't remember any of my piece, (I promise I had it memorized, except like 2 measures) it doesn't sound good with or without the music. So I did one of the few things I could do ... panic. I practiced like 5 more times, and it seemed as if each time I got worse.
My hands got very stiff because they were cold. I get cold when I get nervous, and I WAS NERVOUS! Now as you probably read in the last post, I had to sing as well. I've never done that. I had to sing before I got to play. Anyway, the recital started, and all the beginners made mistakes so that kind of made me feel good.
:) I know that's terrible, but I can't help it! Anyway when we got to the singers my nerves had yet to flare up, which was a good sign. On the list I was the LAST singer! AHH! Let me tell ya. Ok now I must say that all the singers did very well!
I was very pleased with what I heard. So Sis. Amy gets up and calls my name. And I have to play all this out like blink by blink because this is great. I could tell that the people who knew me and had not heard me sing yet didn't really think that I would do so well. Yes I could tell (ok maybe I was hallucinating!).
So I walked up there with confidence (I'll explain where that came from at the end of this). I adjusted the mic and took a breath. Ms. Rhonda was in the sound booth, and I smiled and nodded to go ahead. She smiled back, and started the track. I was breathing heavy now, and yes, I was nervous. But when I took that breath and hit that first note, my fear left, and everything was ok.
It was like yeah this is what I'm supposed to be doing . And I worshiped the Lord with that song and really felt that I lead someone else in worship. I hope I did. And after I finished there was like a sense of shock in the room. I was shocked. I think that is the best I have ever sang that song.
I'm serious. And I have never received so many compliments in my whole entire life! I wish whoever reads this could have been there. Anyway, after that I had to play my piano piece. Now Jesseka, my friend, me, and Andrew, my other friend, all had one big piece, we just had different sections of it. It was not very good!
I mean it was terrible. But we still held our heads high and played it the best we could. Then Ms. Rhonda came to the front of the Church to hand out awards. She called me up there to help her. So we've handed out about 3 awards, and then she looked at me and said "OK Chad you're gonna have to give this next award to yourself". I was like what?!
And she gave me the Oustanding Voice award! That meant so much to me! Everyone was telling me how awesome I sounded and how they were just in shock! It was truely overwhelming and very humbling. Then Ms. Debbie gave me a card and the last thing she said was "I'll be looking for you at the Dove Awards! " That made me cry.
But here is what happened. See I was really dying before all of it started, and I stopped and said, I will not let my fear keep me from doing God's Will. So I prayed, "Lord, I lay my fear at the foot of the cross. I ask that you would take this burden off of me. " And I just let go and worshiped God when I sang, and I praised Him while I played. No I didn't do the best, but I did MY best and that's all that matters to me.
I know the LORD was beside me all night smiling in favor. I'm so blessed and I guess in some way I see why God has called me into the Music Ministry. And I see what He's doing about getting me there! Oh yeah someone has already asked me to sing at their church! I'm so amazed right now, and all I can do is just praise my Father! Now the new challenge is to find something else I can sing! 
