  Long day ahead... Back on the road today, back calling on stores. It should be interesting today, I am still waiting for some bad words about this, and I will most likely find them today. I am going to see some folks who are how shall we say "culturally challenged" you know Rednecks, my old people. I lived amongst these people for years and years, I learned to love country music by my immersion in it, or is the word tortured. I wore the uniform of flannel, denim, and the oversized belt buckle. I still feel ties to country style living, just not its closed mindedness. These people are not going to accept the new me, these people asked if I wanted to use the ladies room after I got my ears pierced last spring.
These people call folks like my brother deviants and living against God. I am sure these folks think like my inlaws did until recently that I was just gay. I am not just gay, NOT THAT THERE'S ANYTHING WRONG WITH THAT. But I am more, much more, I am a transsexual bi with lesbian preferences, but I doubt they would ever get that whole thing. It should be interesting. I am also going to the nastiest little bitch this side of Hades. She has hated my guts ever since the rumor spread about her boob job, she blamed me. I may have told a person or two, but only those who knew even more damaging stuff about her. I have always fantasized about telling this woman off, now I feel past that and a little braver and not as guarded. This woman was and still is the kind of woman who used to use her surgically enhanced cleavage and her sexuality to try and distract men.
I never had the heart to tell her I wasn't as effected as other men. Don't get me wrong she is gorgeous, and if I was into just cheap meaningless sex, she would be great, but her inside ugliness makes the outside nasty and unattractive. I also am going to have pizza with Co and the kids tonight to celebrate her birthday. It should be interesting, I haven't been to their house since I started fulltime RLT. This is the house where my daughter was conceived, it is the house where I confessed my crossdressing to Co, it has lots of memories in it. It also houses Co's brother in the upstairs apartment, the same brother who has a history of getting a little carried away sometimes, and who just recently found out about the whole Ashley thing, he too thought I was gay. I hope it all goes well, and on the way if I have time I am going to swing past my old house up the road.
I haven't been able to go by the street, never mind the house since we sold it last fall, too many memories, but time heals all wounds. After supper I am heading to Hartford for auditions for the gender monologues, a play about gender not in the binary, and transgender stuff. I haven't seen the script yet, but I saw sample monologues, I hope the finished product is better. I am no prude, but certain words loose their effectiveness when overused. Believe me I still throw them around, I actually think I call other women that nasty C word that Co hates enough for me not to use it on her birthday, than when I was a man.
I still have to go to see what this is all about, some of you think I am some kind of Martha Stewart(JUDE) but there is allot more to me than my blanket, my cooking, and such. Time to show my racy raunchy side a bit. I love being well rounded, and I have always wanted to try and act on stage. It should be easier than all the acting I was forced to do to survive and blend in my old male life. But hey there are worse things to be called, Ms. Stewart is a very strong woman who has gone after and gotten what she has wanted, she is my uber-bitch hero.
I wish I could be as strong as she is. I will fill all of you in on the boring details when I get back, while I am watching UCONN beat up on Tennessee. I love the strength these young women have, and to be blunt some of them I find gorgeous, too young for me,and most likely straight, but still gorgeous. Love to all take care. urlLink postCount('108125434245212042'); | urlLink postCountTB('108125434245212042'); 
