  What a shitty new year! If I could only go back and change things. Isn't that what we all say. So here goes my year so far. It starts off I was dating this guy. Amazing, sweet, smart, funny, great conversationalist, and damn good looking.
(anyway) Everything was perfect and he said it was moving to fast and we needed to slow down. No biggie even though it was hard. Three weeks later I was PREGNANT! Damn, after going to the dr and all kinds of fun tests, I was told I had a mass on my uterus. This just keeps getting better and better I tell ya. After telling my best friend I decided to tell him, and it was hard let me tell ya.
Everything went to shit after that. I was trying to stay open w/ him but at the same time keep it a secret from my family. There was one thing I forgot to mention. He was under the impression that I was on the pill. Not because I told him that, but because I never clarified. My bad I know.
So when he reasked the question, stupid me lied to cover it up. I did not want him to think I in anyway tried to trap him or did this on purpose. Crazy I tell ya. I ended up in the emergency room and had a miscarriage, an apandectomy and had the mass removed. Now here is the kicker. Just when you think you can't get any lower right?
WRONG! I told the nurses that I wanted no one to know about anything except the apendectomy because I had kept this a secret from everyone except a couple of people. So when my best friend went to ask how I was with the other situations they told her nothing. So from that point on she thought the whole thing was made up, and instead of her coming back into my room to figure out what was going on...... she left and never came back. She emailed me a couple of days later and I emailed her back but she wanted nothing to do w/ me. I had to come clean w/ my family and let them know everything that was going on.
That was so hard let me tell ya. I have since mailed her the reports so she knew that I did not lie to her. I emailed him to come clean and he wants nothing to do w/ me anymore. I can't blame him though. I miss them both, but I miss my best friend the most. It has been so hard the past couple of months w/ out her.
Will she ever speak to me again? I hope so. If not well maybe everyone is right when they say maybe she was not that good of a friend in the first place. Is this a glimpse into the rest of the year. If it is I would just like to sleep through the whole damn thing! GOOD NIGHT! 
