  if you could hear the way this sounds, you just might be swayed Today was alright, no more, no less. I had a nice afternoon on the grassy hil between california and washington streets. it was an afternoon well spent. The dinner i had to go to was dismal, i had a headache and they had no food that didn't have meat in it. I ended up eating a cookie because i felt really hungery, on the verge of passing out actually. "our chance is gone" I'm not really in the mood to write anything right now.
well i am, just not this. i know... I'll post some of my story up here. the first page or so. how's that sound? okay?
ALRIGHT!!!! Chapter One And it's a shame they all said to her A living shame It's not like it was her fault or anything It was just a shame, that's all. They constantly reminded her of this, the shame and whatnot. She let them, it wasn't really her place to say anything or do anything. It seemed that they liked to sulk around in her problems more than she did. Sure, it was an unfortunate thing to happen, but she wasn't about to bask around in all the sorrow, all the heartbreak, and all the leeway for depression they gave her.
As much as she didn't like to think it, sometimes she thought that she should feel worse about the situation, she should be morose, and sit and cry. Let them make her feel better. Was it wicked not to care? But then again, that wasn't it. She did care; this was just her way of dealing with it. She wasn't trying to pretend that it didn't happen, she knew what happened, she accepted what happened, she grieved but she wasn't going to let the depression take over her life.
It just wasn't how it was meant to be. If we all went into deep depressions every time something went wrong in out lives then no one anywhere would ever be happy. Death was everywhere, there were many evils of the world, but some of them just had to be accepted. Accepted and dealt with. Sure, sometimes depression was okay, but she didn't like the way that they were all pressuring her to feel depressed. Sure she missed them, she really did, and she knew what happened was bad.
But she wasn't going to let it take over her life. She wasn't. She kept telling herself that for a few weeks. That was, until she realized that that was all she was ever thinking about. It wasn't going to take over her life. So she stopped thinking.
Not completely. One can never stop thinking completely. She just stopped thinking about most things. She would let what happen happen. And with that mentality she failed three of her classes and barely passed the others. Everything was just irrelevant.
She came to school when she felt like it. And went to c lass wherever she chose. It was her life right, right? No, it wasn't. Soon enough her stack of counselor request slips fell over on her. She didn't go willingly of course, but she went none the less.
The minute she entered the office she knew she shouldn't have come to school that day. She just knew it. It was a mistake. Perhaps I should back up a bit. Tell the tale for the beginning. Just why she felt pressured to be depressed and why everyone thought it was a shame.
A month prior to her counselor visit her two best friends, well, apparent best friends were killed in a tragic car crash. It's wasn't exactly a crash. Her friends had been standing on the street corner and a car went out of control and hit and killed them at the site. The thing was, although she had spent a lot of time with her two friends, they weren't really her friends. They were there when they felt like it. They didn't really make her feel accepted, but being friends with them was better than sitting home alone on a Saturday night.
But, to the general public, meaning her school community the three of them had been best of friends, real buddies. But her school community saw little and heard even less. She was very aware of this but tried to stand out all the same. Her parents showered her in pity, and, for the most part, left her alone. She had siblings, two brothers, but they were older and she heard from them infrequently. They didn't come home very often.
She was however, more or less content with her home life, if it could be called that. Her parents, in leaving her alone, let her be out as long as she liked, and gave her a nice allowance. She let them think whatever they wanted. She didn't like being home much, and therefore, hardly ever was. 
