  They say that in order to get better at anything in life....you have to jump right in and do it.... Now I love playing poker....it's not about money or even the satisfaction of winning. Those are the bonuses but I love the game. I've been playing tons of online poker, reading a few books and articles on poker strategy, and holding weekly friendly games at my house. But I'd never played poker at a casino against a group of strangers that can see my face and read my style. So when I walked into the poker room at Harrah's Las Vegas for the first time and bought my first rack of 100 one dollar blue chips, I all but kissed each one goodbye before I sat down. The rest of the night was a blur of gin and tonics, constantly changing players, dealers cycling through over and over again..... the only thing that stayed fixed was me.... at table 9.... corner seat.... across from the dealers left shoulder. This was a night of learning, I wasn't expecting to win so I wasn't planning on going up a bit and then running off with winnings.
I wanted to play a lot of hands and see a lot of different players at the table. Skiz and Schwartz left at some point in the early morning, bidding me good luck, which I surely needed. I had gone up early and kept telling myself that if I get back down to even, I'd stop and go to bed. When we had started playing, I had already been up for 16 hours. Flew in that morning, no sleep on the plane (damn you Denzel Washington and your great acting!!!! ), roulette for a couple of hours, drinking with the group for a while, then the poker room. As hour after hour past I kept raising my "go to bed" limit higher and higher.
Leave at +$50....leave at +$100..... Finally, this dealer Xiu Li sits down at my table for the 10th time of the night. She was very soft spoken and very sweet. We had played many hands together over the night. As she dealt the first hand out, she leaned over the table and quietly pleaded "John, go to bed. It's past noon". Holy Crap! I had spent 13 hours at the tables. I'd been awake for 32 hours straight and I was very drunk. Time had flown and I had to leave. I cashed out for $240 on my $100 buy in. Not a bad start at all.
The second night didn't start til around midnight (granted only 12 hours later) I had caught a quick nap for like 3 hours, then hung out with the guys all day. Skiz suggested poker at midnight, and suddenly there I was again. I was very hung over and destined to lose, considering the last night's good fortune. I walked in and a handful of players immediatedly acknowledged me....calling out my various nicknames from the night before "Hey, Kid Jersey! " or "Yo, Atari! " (my previos night's T-shirt) or "It's Johnny T&T! " (my drink Tanqueray and Tonic).
I had realized that the night before I played very sociably....talking to everyone, commenting on lots of hands, making jokes about almost everything, making a lot of friends. This isn't how you play good poker at all, right? You have to hide your emotions and play with your head. Focus on other people and what they do. Concentrate. I decided to play this night serious and sober....very quiet, sit like a statue, give away nothing.
Besides I was too hung over to be as upbeat as last evening. I dropped 100 bucks in the first hour. Everything went wrong. I bet the right hands, I layed down at the right moments, nothing was working. I bought in for a second rack of 100 and lost half of it soon after. I started to think that casino poker really wasn't my game and my luck (and that's all that last night was) may have run out.
If I play here a few more nights I'll be down a ton of money. Maybe I don't belong here and I should keep my gameplay in my house or online in my room. Things were pretty bleak. Enter Joe, the dealer from China, who I called "Big Brother". I gave him that nickname because of how well we hit it off and simply, he shares my older brother's name. After losing a big hand at his table he looked at me and said "John, you're not yourself tonight at all. Uptight doesn't work for you. " I laughed for a moment and thought about the comment. He was right.
I wasn't having as much fun. This game seemed more like work and I was failing. I quickly re-introduced myself to the table, making a joke that Joe had just woken me up. Then I ordered a gin and tonic saying that I was like Pop-Eye and Gin was my spinach. The rest of the night I played like myself. Talking all the time, laughing at the tough breaks. It was fun as hell. I met a few dozen new people and replayed many from the night before.
I learned everybody's name, where they were from, what they did for a living. People from almost every state and every walk of life. I even got a new nickname off the T-shirt I was wearing. At 9am as I was walking up to cash out for the night, the floor boss shook my hand and said "See you tomorrow Harvard?". I looked down at the 5 racks of chips in my arms ($500 total). Then I looked back at the rooms where a bunch of hands shot up for a last wave goodbye. Joe was just sitting there smiling. "Are you kidding me? ", I said, "This is where I belong. " I love playing poker....it's not about money or even the satisfaction of winning. Those are bonuses but I love the game. 
