  Actually,  I didn't go to the party because I never wanted to go.  In fact,  I only agreed to go because Chris bitched about it at me for four hours.  Then,  I decided I didn't want to go,
 and Bryce really didn't want to go either.  Chris called Hobie and asked him to come play afterwards,  not me.  I was sick of playing Halo.  ( But it is unthinkable that you would come hang out with us when you could be hanging out with your real junior friends that invite you to do non-
Xbox stuff all the time.  I've guess I've made it obvious that I don't like some of the juniors.  ( To the Jetpack and John)  I don't really know what to say about the punk thing.  I don't really care anymore what you think it is.
 You have no idea about it,  and anything you and the juniors decide together is bullshit anyway.  Punk is a feeling,  a belief,  a way of life.  You don't have to act or dress a certain way to be a punk.
 The Oselands are punks,  but Schilling is also kind of a punk too for refusing to believe Darwin's theories,  even though the vast majority of the scientific community think he is right.  One aspect of punk is refusing to accept the status quo.  I don't need or seek your validation of my punkness.  "
Punk is a reflection of what it means to be human.  Punk is:  the personal expression of uniqueness that comes from the experiences of growing up in touch with our human ability to reason and ask questions.  - Greg Graffin I am not a punk elitest.  In fact,
 I accept a lot of the people I know as punks.  Some people are punks,  and they don't even know it.  Take Bryce,  for example.  He doesn't care what people think of him,
 and he finds his own path in life.  The reason I call those kids at school psuedopunks is because that is what they are.  They are just striking out because no one will accept them as real people.  They don't understand the difference between being a social outcast and a punk.  You can not walk into a Hot Topic,  buy a T-
shirt,  and become a punk.  Punks find their own truth.  Punks say what they believe and stand up for it.  In the end,  punk is something too pure for you to accept.
 That is okay with me.  But don't try and destroy the way I live because you are unsure about your own lives.  If you think I am a hypocrite,  then tell me so.  I can take it.  In conclusion,
 fuck you both.  I don't have to go suck up to the juniors whenever you feel the need to,  and I don't have to put up with your bullshit either.  All you two care about is what people think about you,  and don't even try to disagree with me because it is obvious and other people agree with me.  Are we cool now?
 If you still have some sort of grudge against me I would be glad to hear it.  I'm glad you said something instead of keeping it inside.  Now that that has been resolved:  Chris,  Erik,  Bryce,
 and I did a bunch of stuff that started Thursday afternoon and ended about an hour ago.  I was going to recap it all,  but this post is going to be bloated enough as it is,  so I'll just say we had fun.  ( One thing:
 Erik's band played a show last night and the new CD's out on Tuesday.  Got some new shoes.  They rock.  They rock hard.  Can you believe that the school year is over already?  I learned almost nothing in actual school but I learned tons in social interaction and about how people tick.
 In two weeks,  the facts will be gone from my head but the lessons about life will stay forever.  So,  here is my year in review.  September:  sucked April:
 sucked really bad All the other months:  not too bad Best CDs I heard all year:  Operation Ivy's Energy and Minor Threat's Complete Discography Still the Greatest CD ever made:  Bad Religion's No Control Favorite Books:  Cat's Cradle,  One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest Favorite Class:
 TV Pro!  Favorite Teachers:  Mr.  Lade and Mr.  Wanninger Was the year better than I expected?  Yeah If I could go back to the beginning of the year,
 what would I tell myself?  Josh,  you wasted a whole year on schoolwork.  Never work hard in school again because it is not worth it and doesn't have any tangible rewards.  Attendance record:  Downright respectable,
 for the first time ever I can't believe that:  I'm sixteen now.  Man,  soon I'll be old.  Who I had the most fun with:  For the tenth year in a row,
 the Oselands Who has more street cred,  Chris or Erik?  Chris does whatever he wants but Erik plays in a band.  I'd say tie.  But last year Erik had more so maybe the tables are turning.  Biggest asshole I know:
 Goat Best song to blare out of your speakers:  TSOL's Code Blue The one person I will deride until the end of time:  Schilling.  He has the worst music taste ever,  no sense of humor,  and he is a crazy fascist.
 He fulfills all three points of the jackass trifecta.  Even the Hobster only hits two of those.  Weirdness award goes to:  Hawkeye.  Someday he is going to flip out and kill us all.  He needs to chill out.
 Biggest asshole I know,  part two:  Chris Derby Number of car accidents I had:  Too many At this rate I expect to be mature in:  23 years Biggest Pedophile:  Scott Bock Number of times I skipped Chemistry:
 4 Number of times I wanted to skip Chemistry:  . however many days were in the second semester New phrases:  Guard Dogs,  Sellout Still the reigning king of all words:  Booglarize The catchiest tune I've ever heard:
 Lamb Effect's Homeless Man My new driving music is:  Ska,  reggae,  hardcore,  and punk Magazines I read:  Spin Websites I couldn't live without:
 www. punknews. org www. nationstates. net www. tompaine.
com www. americanprogress. org www. m- w. com www.
blogger. com Things that I hate more intensely than when school started:  emo,  posers,  intellectuals who think that they are better than everyone else One book everyone should read:  Fast Food Nation Biggest Asshole I know,
 part three:  The collective junior class,  sans Tom and David You should work on your:  spelling and grammar Number of " emo"  moments I had this year:
 Almost none.  Well,  none that were too major.  A kid that everyone likes:  Nate Lucas A kid that everyone hates:  Alex Proctor,
 the G. G.  Allin of BHS Number of pictures I took/ things I taped:  Tons.  I've got a lot of visual documentation that I exist,
 the first time ever to happen Who changed the most:  Everyone changed too much.  I fear change.  I fear and loathe it.  I really hate it when:  I say something and people think I misspoke and make fun of me New friends I made:
 I made a ton.  I might have doubled my friends/ acquaintances,  which I'll attribute to TV Pro.  I went to a show in Pequot last night and I knew pretty much everyone there.  That was eerie.
 Who I'll miss:  Hannah and Kali.  And Nate Lucas.  But mostly Hannah and Kali.  Even though they constantly plotted against me,  pegged me as a uptight,
 bitter old man,  and totally missed who I am,  they were cool.  I miss them already.  Will next year be better?  I dunno.
 In short,  this year had its highs and lows,  like every year.  To my friends:  you need to loosen up.  School isn't that important,
 and you are all going to go crazy by the time you are 20.  Don't worry about what people think about you.  Do what you want,  and remember that just because someone is older than you,  doesn't mean they are wiser.  Have a good summer.
 " We're not the first,  I hope we're not the last 'Cause I know we're all heading for that adult crash The time is so little,  the time belongs to us Why is everybody in such a fucking rush?  - Ian McKaye 
