  all my friends are really tired of me i can tell by the way they talk to me. am i boring?  i guess i am. i am trying not to take this the wrong way. but i mean come on i ma hurt. everyone would rather talk to jessica than me.
and that hurts. wont i ever get a head in life. i love her half ot death but the task of having our cousin as your best friend is not easy. everything is a competition. and i mean EVERYTHING . neil and susan both like her better. i cna not blame them you cant help their prefences but then again i cant help that i ma a boring freak- a- zoid. it hurts. i also feel bad for what i did to caroline jess told me ot do it and it was a fleeting moment kinda thing. i just wanted jess and susan to laugh and now caroline hates me and is friends with jessica again. i learned my lesson. dont get invlolved in other ppl's fights bc now they are not fighting but we are.
ugh. life is so depressing and i hate being depressed i like being happy i am naturally a happy person. but lately i ma so depressd. this sucks. i started watching the ashlee simpson show wed and could not finish it bc i was crying in like the first 5 mins. she was maiking out with this guy and they had found each other and i want that more than anything. ugh,  i sound like a cheese puff. i got my digital camera last night. i like it . well i guess ii will go now.  love,  mandi ps came up with mew nickname. daft didi. d2"
