  I think I'm a lot worse at hiding my feelings than I thought I was. A coworker pulled me aside today & asked why I was "in a funk", to which I responded with a "hmmm, nothing work related" (a total lie, though the intensity in what I'm feeling is probably heightened due to hormones) then I proceeded to turn a bright shade of red & my eyes welled up with tears as I tried to convince her that I was emotionally stable...meanwhile I'm thinking "oh my god, do I have no emotional control whatsoever!?
" I was so embarrassed by the whole situation...but I just couldn't deal with my own feelings today. I know people here mean well, I know they don't want me to pull these ridiculous hours - but it's my time in this time alone in the office where I feel I can really get things accomplished, at my own pace, on my own terms.
I think they misinterpret it as me being a workaholic martyr.....but I don't want a trophy for my long hours, I don't do it to show off my commitment to this place, I don't do it so I have a reason to bitch, I just want to do my job without interruptions & without feeling like I'm being watched & judged on every little thing. I'm so glad tomorrow's Friday! I seriously need a break (& to think this was a short week! ). 
