  Wow, Today is the worst day ever. EVER . I finally told the girl I love that I love her...and today I went back to see her and guess what. "I like you, but there is this other person who likes me". In my mind that basically means I suck, and I should go jump off a cliff for being such a retard. I wanna cry...nothing has ever hurt this much, this hurts more than being shot. Although in a manner of words I was shot, my dreams and hopes were shot down. Gunned hown by the only girl I ever loved, isn't that ironic. At least I do have one thing to show...I have this 2nd degree burn on my right arm, from when I was fighting Tori's brother so I could tell her I loved her. Well, I have a scar from war, the war of love, and it seems as if I have lost, yet again. At least this time I know that I loved her, and that will never change, she will always be the first, and maybe last girl I ever loved.
Maybe by the last things I said to her she will realize that my love is true, the last thing I said was something like (keep in mind I am not the best speaker, especially when nervous) "Tori...umm...I had this beautifully orchrestrated speech, but I totally forgot it, oh well. Ohh I remember, I'm tired of running away, that's all I've ever done...umm...Well I'm not going to run away, I feel like I would be betraying you if I just ran away, and I'm not going to do that. I'll always be here for you, always...and ohh ya I don't think I said this in spoken words yesterday, but I love you. " God...please help me... Now, I think it is time to go crawl into a hole and cry... Jon 
