  Well the heat is upon us and daily activities are getting harder and harder. I find myself struggling with unemployment, frustration, depression. HOLD ON...Let me stop there. I am very happy to be pregnant, really, I am thrilled to see my belly getting bigger and wonder who the little boy inside will be. I know that there are so many blessings to be thankful for, But I would be lying if I didn't admit to feeling depressed and frustrated. Everything is changing, losing control and slowing down, has been very tough for me , big life lessons. I feel pretty useless and dependent more and more on Steve, which makes me uncomfortable, because I know how he trying to find his own footing, come to terms with all he is dealing with.
I have got to find some work. UGGGHH!! Hard also to know the "normal" aches and pains from" scary" aches and pains. somedays they are very simular to miscarriage pains. But then I try to calm myself down and trust. I want to be able to feel "stronger" more at peace, believe this is all heading where it should. I guess the only way to start that is to just start smiling more. Right? 
