  hahha.  as the title suggests.  i guess u noe what i mean.  haha.  how sian can it get.  listen,
 listen and listen.  do u ever think they are telling u the truth.  u only noe what pple want u to noe.  that means that u only get part of it.  and u nv ever get an accurate perspective so what's right and what's not.  it becomes worse when u put so much trust in them only to realise that u've been doing everything in vain.
 so why in hell do u want to look for me?  cos i make u feel better by covering up the truth due to my ignorance?  haha.  ignore the crap i am writing here.  i dun understand u.  and i dun understand myself.
 so dun bother interpreting.  cos u nv get anywhere by speculating.  how far do u think u can get by being nice to other pple?  nowhere.  do u even get back 50%  no man.
 u dun get anything cos they think u're a moron.  so what can u do?  the best and easiest way is to walk away alone.  u are not escaping frm the problem.  u are saying this to the problem.  look there's no way i can handle u and the best i can do is to leave u alone while i can't stop u frm pestering me u can't stop me frm leaving u alone.
 by the way " u"  does not refer to any specific person or any grp of pple.  so dun bother guessing.  and b4 u start asking whether i am ok.  "
I am OK"  yeah.  haha i believe that in order to make urself complete there got to be a few components.  u urself make up one of that component and others like ur friends and family make up the other components.  i nv had much problems with my own component cos it has always been small.  but my other components that makes a large part of me seem to be failing me as i fall deeper and deeper.
 i am searching for some kind of sanctuary.  and there is this component that has never been filled and is hard to fill.  no one else other than that someone whom u feel a special attachment to can fill.  that is assuming that the person feel the same way.  well well.  enough is enough.
 all i can do is to try my best to think less and look at it from a straightforward view.  ignorance is gd sometimes.  even if u do noe.  u can always pretend not to noe.  it's a form of self- protection.
 as long as no pain is inflicted on anyone in that process.
