  Just came back from another eventful day of Cell Group. shared out for the first time. YES me. Opened my mouth for the 1st time in CG to share God's word PSalms 91:4.... it was suppose to be that story of a bird who tried to save her hatchlings from a forest fire that she covered her little ones with her WINGS, and she herself perished in the Falmes of the Forest fire. the WINGS OF GOD. BUT I STOPPED short...pooped stooped and Fumbled.
and went ER... ER.... and that was it! and best of all I saw everyone's eyes wide open in a gawking manner to what I was sharing. Then, in a Split second, I heard the VOICE "I AM PROUD OF YOU!". and in that very moment. I said, "oh God, must you do this to me"...*sigh* This is my fear, and yes, the very stage fright that I got when I was not prepared or did things impromtu. FEAR always has been paralysing.
giving a hold on you. vowing never to let go. I guess Tomorrow I'll call up the telephone company to inform them I shall take the job as a Part time. though it is less money. but I guess it's a good way to have a flexible time schedule. Less money for more flexibility.
worth it? a friend gave me an advice that is to take part time first and see the work load. if it not as much and I can still cope, then ask for the job Full time. talk with the company about it though. GREAT, THAt's Settled. Vern was talking to me about being how it was to feel that I was taken out of the CG guitarist.
My answer was that I guess God had other plans for me. if I couldn't serve that, which I think I am not meant to be there. I was to serve somewhere else. and if CG doesn't need my help. Then at best, I'll serve God everyday. having God's Presence with me when I talk to people, be with people, and shake some off to the people around me.
God didn't write 2COR 4:7 for nothing .....TREASURE CHESTs are nothing without TREASURE. Further more, we have a never ending supply of TREASURE that is in our LORD JESUS CHRIST. how more valuable are we, A treasure chest that when you Take TREASURE out from, and it NEVER GOES EMPTY!!! and it goes on in 2COR 4:8,9 to explain to us how Rigid and strong we have become in Christ. "We are HARD PRESSED on every side, but not crushed; PERPLEXED but not in DESPAIR; PERCUTED but not ABANDONED; STRUCK DOWN, but not DESTROYED. " I struggled with my past, my hurts, my money problems, my search for a good woman, My guilt.
MY DEMONS...........but I always get up. SORROW looks BACK, WORRY Looks AROUND, FAITH looks UP. God bless all who read this 
