  To my dear, dear friend, As much as I would hate to lose you I'm afraid we are coming closer and closer to the crossroads. I know you aren't well and that you don't intentionally try to hurt me but I have the feeling that I am doing *everything* I can to make things good for you and for us and it's simply not enough. For some reason, perhaps you have forgotten that I am human and far from perfect. hu·man urlLink adj. Of, relating to, or characteristic of humans: the course of human events; the human race. Having or showing those positive aspects of nature and character regarded as distinguishing humans from other animals: an act of human kindness.
Subject to or indicative of the weaknesses, imperfections, and fragility associated with humans: a mistake that shows he's only human; human frailty. Having the form of a human. Made up of humans: formed a human bridge across the ice. Perhaps you have also forgotten that YOU are human and not perfect either. I do not criticise you for this, I accept you, your behaviour and very importantly your illness. Once again we are 'starting over'.
We had more than a month of good times together, only to have something negative dropped in your mailbox from your neighbours which directly relates to me and you. Somehow I have the feeling you blame me for this. I do take responsibility, yes, but I am not to blame fully. Since then you have found ways to be annoyed with me, some ways are pretty justifiable, others I'm not so sure about (but, hey, it's possible they are all justifiable, but being a bit stubborn it's not so easy to accept everything negative that you hear about yourself). Your reactions to these situations are also somewhat justifiable, but others are way over the top. Why will you punish me with not being able to see you when you have your kids?
You know that I like them very much, I enjoy being around them... yet, you are not willing to take the "risk" anymore that you will be annoyed with me... so, just as I'm building a relationship with them, you take it away from me. I am sitting here, trying very very hard to understand what went wrong and when and how I can fix it. First you were in love with me. Now you are not. You wanted us to have less contact, less emails, less text messages, yet many times YOU are the one who calls, etc. Once again you shut me out... you want to think about what you want... you know you want stability...
I'm not sure where you are going to get that when you are not totally stable yourself. You know I want to give that to you, yet you push and push and push me away. So, my dear friend, the one I will never ever forget, the one who made a huge impact on me in a very short period of time, you will always have a special place in my heart. If you do happen to want something with me, it's time to play by more compromising rules. Otherwise, I think we may have to say goodbye. It's give and take.
I have bent over backwards and turned cartwheels for you. Not because I had to, because I WANTED to. You take it but you give back only sporadically. I don't know what you want or what you expect from me. It's better now that you figure it out and get on with your life. In the meantime, I'm going to take care of my life.
Love Pinky 
