  Mmmm...mmmm...mmmm...I love me some good birthday cake. Yummy icing pink or blue and moist yellow cake. When I was little my mom would get birthday cakes with a nice pineapple layer to keep everything moist. It was a happy suprise. Its nobody's birthday anytime soon and restaurants don't sell birthday cakes by the slice, do they? I wish they did. I'd buy the slice with some of the flower edging and part of the letter "B".
This weekend I went to a friend's wedding reception. The couple eloped and had a party to celebrate their marriage. It was a cool party. Open bar...very light refreshments. For dinner I had a little of the macaroni (not allot because it tasted like Miracle Whip....ewwww)and a diet coke, a cosmopolitan, a margarita, an apple martini, a chocolate martini, a fuzzy navel...that was enough. I got on the dance floor and started doing my Solid Gold Dancer routine. Then I danced with this guy who kept saying things like, "Go baby, yeah baby...don't stop".
It was like being in a bad porn movie. Meanwhile, I went with a neighbor and her brother and her brother kept touching me and touching my left breast (did I tell you I really don't think the word breast is cool. I did in an earlier post. Its not sexy. Oh, yeah touch me, touch me there, right there...oh yeah, mmmmmm...now suck it..suck it...suck my breast baby. See? Not sexy. ) Afterwards we went to a local diner, had breakfast and then took a taxi home.
The next morning I woke up and oh, well...it could have been worse. That's what I kept telling myself. Are you reading this and thinking you've done allot worse? Hmmmmm? See, I hate losing control. I don't do it easily. Since it doesn't happen allot, when it does I'm all like, "why the fuck did I do that?
" And in other news...I am under the weight of the I need to go back to school, I hate my apartment, I wish I could come home and feel like it was home and then I don't change it because I only know how to survive, I don't know how to live feeling. Do you know what I mean? Growing up life was so miserable...we were very poor and how the house looked and being comfortable was not important. We worried about food and shoes and having heat in the winter. And we all shared a bed and it was just surviving and not living. I rarely felt safe there and that's the feeling I know...the not feeling safe feeling the slightly tense waiting for whatever is going to happen feeling.
I'm working on that. Its hard. I said allot today. Tomorrow I will probably delete it but today its here. Well, I'd better go get the laundry. Take care, December Blue I'd like to buy the world some cake and keep it company. 
